The baddest of bad girls returns for her China Anniversary! Your Major Spoilers review of Hellina #1 awaits!
HELLINA #1
Writer: Jay Nitz
Artist: Gabriel Andrade
Colorist: Digikore
Letterer: Jaymes Reed
Editor: Jim Kuhoric
Publisher: Boundless Comics
Cover Price: $8.99
Release Date: July 3, 2019
Previously in Hellina: Hellina is Hell’s Adjudicator, sent in to clean house when creatures-of-the-night get out of control. Heaven and Hell waged war for millennia, spanning worlds and dimensions, with a clear good vs. evil story to be told in scripture and in holy houses.
Until Hell won.
SEX AND VIOLENCE AND BIBLICAL HISTORY
Our story opens in Texas, like so many tales of good and evil before it, with a horde of monsters and abominations all working to protect a vampire, one whom Hellina has come to collect. There aren’t many rules in the world after Hell has taken over, but “No Mind Control” is apparently one of them, and he’s been breaking the rules. In order to bring him down, Hellina must fight her way through every one of his protectors, spending nearly HALF the issue in epic, brutal, blood-soaked combat. She tears limb from limb, disembowels, bisects and beheads, tearing through the monsters of Dallas before finally mocking that they could only kill her by drowning her in their blood. When the vampire finally comes forth, he accepts that he is going to die, but remarks that he’d rather go out having sex (though he uses the f-word) than fighting, and Hellina obliges him. Twelve pages of violence is followed by three pages of sex, and a final request from Simon the vampire: Let him see one last sunset. That ends predictably, leaving Hellina to head off to her next mission, one that involves one of the most bemusing phrases in recent memory: “CHERUB BOMBS!”
EARNS IT’S ‘MATURE’ RATING
As someone who remembers the first run of Hellina, this book is a pretty impressive step up in terms of art, story and most of all, in the character’s design and costume. Compared to some of the original issues, this comic has a lot going for it. I really kind of enjoyed Hellina’s endless boasting, combined with a history of what things were like back in the day, when angels and demons and such fought endlessly for control of the Earth. Perhaps the best part of the story is the conceit that our modern world is what happens after Hell won the endless war of good and evil, which is a meta-statement that makes gives this issue’s sex and violence a little extra space. Even though it’s not a comic for me, I can appreciate the complexity of the art (Hellina’s whip, made of a shoggoth, is a fascinating HR Giger nightmre creation) and even though I never wanted to see a busty supermodel ripping an army of monstrosities apart before having sex with a vampire, I have to admit that Andrade draws it all with style, reminding me a bit of Juan Jose Ryp’s work on other Avatar titles.
BOTTOM LINE: NOT FOR ME, BUT IT’S NOT A BAD COMIC
I’m not the kind of person who is going to recommend this sort of gore-fest without someone first telling me that they’re into the work of Herschell Gordon Lewis, but if that sort of ultra-violence and adult content is your jam, this book will hit a number of spots. Hellina #1 makes a lot of hay out of the concept of Hell’s enforcer and provides the hook for an interesting Heaven Vs. Hell story once it’s established our hero’s bona fides with the ol’ ultra-violence and a good shagging, earning 3 out of 5 stars overall. I cannot stress enough how important it is that you observe the ‘Adults Only’ rule here, though.
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HELLINA #1
It's not a comic book for the faint of heart, but it's got a lot going for it, including some snappy dialogue and attractive art.
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Writing6
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Art7
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Coloring6
Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.