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    Major Spoilers Poll of the Week: Bieber vs. Giraffe Edition

    Stephen SchleicherBy Stephen SchleicherOctober 27, 201512 Comments1 Min Read

    I didn’t think our Superfight could get any more strange, but it has, in a very unexpected way.

    SUPERFIGHT is a game where you argue with your friends over ridiculous fights. The game is very simple. It’s fun for all levels and kinds of players.

    The main deck consists of 500 cards, split between character cards (white cards), and powers and weaknesses (black cards). These cards are used to create fights like this:

    A KINDERGARTEN CLASS THAT BREATHES FIRE AND IS WEARING JETPACKS vs. A PIRATE SWINGING A SHARK ON A CHAIN AND RIDING A SEGWAY.

    As you can imagine, the arguments over who would win the fight are epic and hilarious.

    VOTE!

    [poll id=”410″]
    justin bieber Major Spoilers poll of the week Superfight
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    Stephen Schleicher
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    Stephen Schleicher began his career writing for the Digital Media Online community of sites, including Digital Producer and Creative Mac covering all aspects of the digital content creation industry. He then moved on to consumer technology, and began the Coolness Roundup podcast. A writing fool, Stephen has freelanced for Sci-Fi Channel's Technology Blog, and Gizmodo. Still longing for the good ol' days, Stephen launched Major Spoilers in July 2006, because he is a glutton for punishment. You can follow him on Twitter @MajorSpoilers and tell him your darkest secrets...

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    12 Comments

    1. Brenning Dragonbred on October 27, 2015 11:55 am

      A wet paper bag could beat Bieber. Not a super-powered wet bag, just a plain wet paper bag blowing under a gust of wind. Obviously the Giraffe wins this round.

    2. Russell Catt on October 27, 2015 12:14 pm

      Justin Bieber is not the threat here. It’s the Battle-Cat.
      Or in my head, it’s THE Battle-Cat.
      Battle-Cat could destroy a giraffe without issue. Glue-gun or no.

    3. Arju on October 27, 2015 12:33 pm

      Bieber will conquer with power of the internet. Also he would win because his handlers and his bielbers would fight for him and no mater how many fall before the power of the mighty glue welding ,lightning throwing giraffe they would keep on coming like a human tidal wave till Bieber had won.

    4. Ingrid on October 27, 2015 12:37 pm

      Plainly the giraffe. The glue hose will slow the Battle Cat down, and the light rays have a considerably longer range than Cupid’s bow. That bow is designed for fairly short range.

    5. Ray on October 27, 2015 12:43 pm

      as a Canadian, and on behalf of my people, I hope the Giraffe not only wins, but the Massacre is so great, there is nothing left of Bieber but a few lame ass tattoos and a muff of over-gelled hair atop an angry Persian, with cardboard armour and a tiny heart shaped bow, with a broken string in it’s teeth

    6. Mike on October 27, 2015 12:58 pm

      If it’s just A battle cat, the giraffe triumphs. If it’s Battle Cat from Master’s of the Universe, then he would team up with the giraffe to destroy Bieber, so the Giraffe wins again!

    7. WitchRolina on October 27, 2015 5:13 pm

      Two words: Rabid Fangirls. That giraffe may face Bieber by technicality, but the guy has henchmen. Er, Henchgirls? They’re certainly not women yet on account of still being in school, but still! It may not be specifically stated, but he has them. I mean, here he is, mounted on a battle cat ready for battle, and if his minons start to drop off, he has freaking cupid’s bow to make more.

      I really, really, REALLY hate to say this, but the only reason Bieber looses this fight is because people aren’t thinking things through and are voting against him on account that he’s freaking Bieber.

      • Armaan on October 31, 2015 1:22 am

        Okay, you just made this fight scene in my head SO MUCH BETTER!
        Picturing Justin and his Battle Cat in his Evil Guy costume and fan girl henchmen against the laser-shooting giraffe that has a superhero outfit and a tiny little cape that both say “SGG” on it for Super-Glue Giraffe.

    8. Shitowl on October 28, 2015 10:36 am

      I believe the hands of blinding light would greatly impede the battle cat, and Bieber would never risk getting superglue in his super coif. That said Bieber not wanting to get too close would attempt to use his Cupid’s bow. However his now vision impaired steed is accidentally struck by Bieber’s missile of love, immediately falls in love with the giraffe, pounces on Bieber, and devours him. The dark clouds part the sun shines again, and all is right in the new Bieber free universe.

    9. Jeffrey Corbello on October 29, 2015 12:06 pm

      I think Beiber’s Canadian good looks and Cupid’s bow could amorously distract Glueraffe. And that is when Battle Cat attacks and disembowels from the side. Clever girl.

    10. Thunderhowl on October 30, 2015 6:34 am

      All giraffe, all day. Have you ever tried to get glue out of a cat’s fur? It’s no picnic, sir, I assure you.

    11. Toric on October 30, 2015 6:57 pm

      The real question here is this: how can each combatant harm the other? The giraffe can blind its opponent, immobilize its opponent, but against such a small target it has only its legs to attack with. Legs that could get caught in the very glue it has used to cripple the Battle Cat.

      Which brings us to the Beebs, who has a freaking Battle Cat. Which is essentially a bigger, meaner lion. This already gives Justin the advantage, but the bow grants him anything from an extra edge to a possible one-hit knockout depending on what it does. If in this case it’s a classic bow, just magic, Justin at least has the option of dismounting and providing covering fire to allow the Cat a chance to strike. If however it makes things fall in love with other things, he just has to land one arrow and suddenly he has a Battle Cat, Cupid’s Bow, and a sun-giraffe with superglue-hoses.

      Victory goes to Beiber unless the giraffe gets lucky.

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