Author: Matthew Peterson

Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.

Or – “The Calm Before The Storm Before The Even Bigger Storm…” After yesterday’s apocalyptic epic tale of destruction, conflict, death, (Contrary to my inital report, Marvel says that 53 people died during the course of the battle, including 6 costumed superheroes.  I fear for Nighthawk.) and crying Captain Americas, I feel the need to purge, to cleanse the palate with a nice fruity sorbet, as Wayne Campbell might put it.  And nothing’s better to get the taste of ashes and broken friendships out of your mind than some nice, straightforward storytelling.  When I want a breath of fresh air, I pick…

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Or – “Much Ado About… Something…” It’s one of the most talked-about series in years… The final nail in the coffin of the Status Quo (at least until the next big series shakeup), the foundations of a new Marvel Universe, and the entire series has been filled with moments that you thought they couldn’t top. Marvel has set expectations incredibly high with this series, and after the lukewarm response (not to mention the lukewarm stories) of “House of M,” it’s a chance to show that they’re the industry leader for a reason. You’ve read about it, debated it, complained vehemently…

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Or – “Superstar Is Such A Subjective Term…” This issue marks two separate benchmarks in the history of the New Avengers. We finally get to see the first glimpses of the post-Civil War lineup (and it’s certainly interesting), and we see the debut of Leinil Yu as penciller. Marvel Comics, Wizard, and six guys who read Wolverine have informed me how wonderful his art is, and I’m looking forward to finally seeing what the wunderkind has to offer. Bear in mind, however, that Wizard has also tried to sell me on the work of Rob Liefeld, Bart Sears, Steve Platt,…

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Or – “Stand By For Matthew ‘Mark-Out’ Moment In Three… Two… One…” I realized something during this issue of USFF that I hadn’t realized before… The structure of this story is very much a classical “rags to riches” tale, with the characters starting at their lowest points (or in some cases, being INTRODUCED at an intentionally low point) and building towards heroism. The thing that masked it from me was, ironically, the one piece of the puzzle that stuck in my craw: Not all the old Fighters were dead. In fact, as I intimated last time, one of them was…

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Or – “You Don’t Know What You’ve Got, Blah Blah Blah…” The Heroes for Hire have, so far, been very much on a rocket bus, with the first couple of issues racing through a Civil War tie-in (with Misty and Colleen taking a stand against Iron Man, and NOT getting beaten within an inch of their lives in the middle of a street, proving that if you want to get anything past Tony Stark, it’s best to have mammaries), then a second arc of high speed mayhem featuring Ricadonna, several supervillains who should be dead (a recurring them for this…

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Or – “Dying Is Easy, Comedy Is Hard… And They’ve Tried One Already.” Okay, that’s probably not fair. After all, comedy is difficult, and many writers who have a good grasp of dialogue, story, and character can’t be funny. Heck, even the writers who are PROVEN funny (guys like Dan Slott, Kurt Busiek, even Joss Whedon) aren’t 100% universally hilarious. They say that beauty is in the eye of the beholder, but the often-imitated, never-duplicated concept known as “The Funny” is trapped somewhere between the lens and the retina of the beholder, forever entombed in eye goop. Why do you…

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Or – “Jamie Madrox, Agent of S.H.E.E.S.H.” Everybody knows what it’s like to be indecisive, unable to make a decision. I’ve spent the entire year 2007 barely capable of deciding fries vs. onion rings, one of the unpleasant side effects of the year from Aitch Ee Double Hockey Sticks. Imagine how much worse it would be if I could actually separate portions of my personality and let them fight it out among themselves… You really have to feel bad for James Madrox. Not only do his moods get the best of him, sometimes they go walkabout and dig holes that…

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Or – “They Talk Of Days For Which They Sit And Wait And All Will Be Revealed…” “When there’s trouble, you know who to call… OUTSIDERS! From their floating ship, they see it all… OUTSIDERS! With Judd Winick writing the script! From the headlines adventures are ripped! And if you’re lucky there’ll be girl-on-giiiirl! OUTSIDERS! With their superpowers they unite… OUTSIDERS! One Year Later, nothing is quite right… OUTSIDERS! Doc Sivana made them all think! But our heroes just told him he stinks! And Katana’s costume is the woooorrst! OUTSIDERS! O! U! T-S-I! D-E-R! S! OUTSIDERS, GOOOOO!”

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Or – “Is It Still A Revamp When There’s Nothing Of The Old Concept Left?” The year was 1997… It was cold in Hays, Kansas, I remember that much. Granted, it’s pretty much always cold in Hays, but nevertheless. My friend Bruce had picked up an issue of The Hulk that featured strange new heroes, led by a star-spangled goof in a pointy mask, and I immediately found them intriguing. With The Avengers, The Fantastic Four, Iron Man and The Hulk trapped in a parallel universe (a strange and bizarre place where someone foolishly thought that Rob Liefeld could draw…

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Or – “Aren’t EVERYONE’S Siblings Out Of Their Minds?” The second issue of Justice Society of America featured the Heywood family reunion, a function that has been attended by two generations of superheroes (with a third on the way). From a comic book standpoint, the Commanders Steel have it easy. Can you imagine a Mar-Vell family reunion? Or a Stark family reunion? (Seems like every four or five years, somebody comes out of the woodwork to steal Tony’s company out from under him, so you know there’s more of ’em out there…) Now, imagine Christmas dinner at the Ranzz household,…

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Or – “What The Heck Do I Call A Dead Character NOW?” There’s an inherent pitfall to the way I do my reviews. My rules are simple: I pick some titles to go over, stick ’em in a pile by my comfy chair, and review them, in roughly chronological order. Scan the good bits, babble incoherently, then enjoy a Milk-Bone in a commie-free world. But when a book comes out that has spoilery material, it quickly becomes a topic of discussion, and makes me feel like I’m behind the curve when I get ’round to it. Case in point? Civil…

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Or – “Time Is An Illusion. Lunchtime, Doubly So.” In my other job, I have been fielding a lot of questions about why the series was solicited as 6 issues, but the story hasn’t ended here. Indeed, until this issue, each month’s Eternals bore the legend “(issue #) of 6.” Simple answer: Neil Gaiman asked for more pages to finish out his story, and, with millions upon millions of Sandman trades in circulation, you don’t say no to Neil Gaiman. He’s the nicest 500 pound gorilla in comics. When I covered issue four of this series, sometime back in the…

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Or – “The Chimp’s Got It Figured Out…” It’s actually quite heartening to see Checkmate hitting double-digits. It’s not precisely the kind of book you normally get from DC, an attempt at a hard-hitting spy-style drama, with the added difficulty of being set within the confines of a world where every thirteenth person gets phenomenal cosmic power with the purchase of a Big Gulp at 7-11. This issue actually takes that proverbial bull by the horns, trying to streamline the Shadowpact (a team consisting of a talking chimpanzee, a interdimensional teleporter, a cloth Golem, an azure demon, a sorceress of…

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Or – “The Thin Line Between High Concept and Dumb Idea.” Yesterday was the first Saturday of the month, what we at Gatekeeper Hobbies (Gage & Huntoon, Topeka, KS, tell ’em Matthew sent ya!) call “Buying Day.” Padding out the bottom of a box of comics we MEANT to buy was a very dog-eared copy of Master Of Kung Fu, circa 1980, that was bound for one of two places: The Quarter Bin, or my collection. Since the two are generally synonymous (and since I remember this book from my youth), I thought we might all enjoy it together, and…

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