I’ve been reading comics off-and-on since the year 1979, and occasionally, I am asked why the ’90s era comics are so often reviled. We are about to find out why. Your Major Spoilers Retro Review of Avengers: Timeslide #1 awaits!
AVENGERS: TIMESLIDE #1
Writer: Bob Harras and Terry Kavanagh
Penciler: Roger Cruz/Luke Ross/Fabio Laguna/Frank Toscano/Manny Clark/Oclair Albert/Scott Koblish/Rene Micheletti
Inker: Mike Thomas
Colorist: Malibu Color Separations
Letterer: Bill Oakley
Editor: Ralph Macchio
Publisher: Marvel Comics
Cover Price: $4.95
Current Near-Mint Pricing: $5.00
Release Date: December 5, 1995
Previously in Avengers: Timeslide: The Image Comics era had an immediate ripple effect on the comics of the day, and one of the biggest was a shift in the visual style of the Big Two. A less obvious one came in the ever-accelerating cycle of massive crossover events, each eclipsing the last, sometimes before the first one was over. Admittedly, Marvel editorial (especially under Jim Shooter) bears a portion of the blame, but the exodus of the Image creators exacerbated the situation. The presence of former X-editor Bob Harras at the forefront of the Avengers line had triggered a conscious X-Menification of the franchise as well, including one of the worst “Everything You Know Is WRONG” moments in comic book history: The “revelation” that Tony Stark was and HAD ALWAYS BEEN a pawn of Kang the Conqueror.
This issue begins with Avengers Mansion locked down by Iron Man and Kang, while the Avengers try to break in, opposed by an army of Anachronauts, as New York watches in horror.
The sudden opening of a time portal hidden in the basement sweeps a handful of Avengers (Captain America, Black Widow, Century, Vision, and Edwin Jarvis) into the timestream. Thanks to Century, the heroes find themselves ten years in their past, confronted by a younger Jarvis, still the butler of Anthony and Maria Stark, at the precise point where Kang’s son Tobias has landed, for reasons unknown.
Enter: Reasons unknown.
The story tells us that this is a handsome, nineteen-year-old Tony Stark, despite looking like Casper the Friendly Ghost’s angry uncle Stinky. As Tony speeds home, we are treated to cameos of Matt Murdock, young Peter Parker, Ben Grimm, and Susan Storm, because this is the past, after all. The heroes arrive too late to keep Tobias from stealing away Tony’s parents, but the young Stark can track them, thanks to a cameo he created for Mrs. Stark. Using that knowledge, he tags along as the heroes head for the tiny European nation where Tobias took them, a country called… Latveria.
Uh oh.
The heroes of past and future storm Castle Doomstadt, mostly because the young Stark refused to wait until they had a plan, confronting Tobias. The Anachronaut collapses the ceiling in an attempt to crush his foes, but succeeds only in splattering Howard and Maria beneath crumbling masonry. Everyone then proceeds to do something stupid: Captain America saves Tony, who is wearing an armored repulsor harness. The Black Widow disappears entirely. As for The Vision, an android with a computer brain and the ability to alter his density for nigh-endless versatility?
He becomes a mindless slugging machine, because 1996.
For those of you who are wondering, yes. That is the classic Bruce-kneeling-over-his-dead-mother framing from Frank Miller’s Batman: The Dark Knight Returns. It’s also one of the best bits of storytelling in the issue, partly because it’s stolen from a more talented creator. The kludged-together nine-person art team was apparently assembled with the requisite of aping Jim Lee, a command which they have stuck to religiously. It should be noted that Lee is, and was in 1996, quite talented, and had the chops to get away with many of the stylized elements of his art. With apologies to all creators involved, none of these artists are. As for Tony, he swears vengeance on the man who murdered his mother.
The disembodied voice in that final panel turns out to be the new dictator of Latveria, and the master of Castle Doomstadt, Victor Von Doom himself, who recognizes Captain America’s history and offers the team the use of his time platform. Returning to the future, The Avengers face an uncertain, uphill battle.
This issue is actually a side trip from the 25-part crossover called The Crossing, a story that was designed to revitalize what was seen as a moribund Iron Man as Marvel entered the 21st Century, but… it didn’t. In fact, The Crossing was such a mess that Marvel literally licensed Avengers properties TO the creators at Image Comics who had left the company a couple of years earlier. Nearly everything about this crossover has been retconned, with both the “working for Kang” and “teen Iron Man” elements being immediately ignored. The subplot that indicated that this issue’s villain Tobias and his twin brother Malachi were actually Vision and The Scarlet Witch’s sons, Tommy and Billy, was negated by Avengers Forever, which also removed Kang entirely from the crossover. Instead, the nonsensical events were orchestrated by Kang’s older self and temporal rival, Immortus, to sow confusion, which is as close as Marvel editorial will ever come to saying, “We know this was dumb, so let’s move on.”
The upshot of Avengers: Timeslide #1 is that it is literally meaningless, featuring subpar art, a nonsensical story, and features the debut of Teenage Iron Man, a character meant to revitalize one hero who ended up being a major part of the entire company going bankrupt, earning 0 out of 5 stars overall.
In a word, avoid.
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AVENGERS: TIMESLIDE #1
What I've just read is one of the most insanely idiotic things I have ever encountered. At no point in this rambling, incoherent issue were the creators even close to anything that could be considered a rational thought. Everyone reading about this issue is now dumber for having experienced even this small portion of it.
I award this issue no points, and may God have mercy on its soul.
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