If you are looking for the Major Spoilers reviews of comic books from the comic book industry, you’ve found it! The best and the worst comics are reviewed each week.
Or – “I Thought They Only Had Fiery Latinas On Wacky Sitcoms…” I don’t usually mentally stunt-cast actors in the roles of comic book characters, (and I whine when Mike Deodato does it for Norman Osborn) but whenever I see Fire (aka Green Fury, Green Flame, and Beatriz Da Costa), my mind puts actress Judy Reyes from Scrubs in the scene. This has absolutely nothing to do with this issue, mind you, I just wanted to share. In any case, since Checkmate, Volume II began, White Queen Amanda Waller has seemed to have some sort of hold (blackmail? loyalty?) over
Or – “It’s Like When You Can’t Quite Break Up With The Unhealthy Girlfriend…” Well, it’s time to review Manhunter, and that means it’s time for… CANCELLATION WATCH 2007!! *cues dramatic music/graphics package* Attention Mr and Mrs America and all the ships at sea! Manhunter, originally cancelled with issue 25, then revived, then recancelled with issue #30, has officially been uncancelled. DC, always a bit manic depressive with cancelling Manhunter, announced at the New York Comicon that Kate’s title is ongoing again, and this time it’s for the long haul. None other than Dan Didio announced at the convention that
Or – “No Joke From Me This Time…” Yes, once again I am compelled to do this on the day of release, and once again I must warn anyone reading this that I *WILL* be spoilering large aspects of the story. This will be a full review of Captain America #25. If you don’t want to know what happens right now, DO NOT CLICK the “more” link. This is your only warning, as I’m still completely in shock at the events of this issue, and what few filters I may have aren’t filtering worth a rot…
Or – “You Know You’re Tough When You Can Fight A Wendigo In Your Underwear…” She-Hulk is one of those series that tends to avoid most people’s radar, with only the occasional mention by the fan press or internet to remind the non-readers that it’s still out there, and that’s really too bad. In any given month, one issue of She-Hulk will give you more for your entertainment value than many of the top ten “Hot Books.” I’ve never walked away from an issue of Dan Slott’s take on the green giantess wondering why I was looking forward to it,
Or – “Things Are Just About To Get (More) Interesting…” I’ll say it again: I don’t see why Birds of Prey isn’t DC’s best-selling title. There’s something for everyone here. The main characters have years of history, tying into JLA, into Batman, into the New Gods, even to the old Charlton comics. (Speaking of which, if Renee Montoya does what it looks like she’s gonna do, I’d love to see HER in BoP, wouldn’t you?) If you’re a continuity buff, it’s in there for you. The plots are always involving, the action fast and interesting, with aspects of Action/Adventure, Cloak
Or – “Superheroes Make For Some Interesting Fathers…” As a parent, I find it interesting how the superheroes treat their kids. The poster child for this is, of course, Franklin Richards, whose mutant abilities have popped him up and down the power charts like a whore’s drawers. Young Frankie’s parents only refer to him when they want to hurt each other by calling their spouse neglectful, only to return to their experiments/flirtations-with-fishmen the moment their ire cools. The Vision and The Scarlet Witch’s children were wished out of existence, we’ve seen recently the toll that an absentee Batman father had
Or – “This Is The Dawning Of The Age Of Aquarius! Aquaaaariuuuuuuus!” Eel O’ Brien is a character who has seen a lot of incarnations, even as comic book characters go. Originated by Quality Comics back in Dubya Dubya Two, O’Brien became one of the most visually memorable characters of the Golden Age, not merely able to stretch, but change his shape completely, even create complex machinery or be cut into pieces without losing his cohesiveness. The Eelster disappeared in 1956, when a foundering Quality Comics finally went under, but he certainly wasn’t forgotten. At some point, DC Comics acquired
I could go for a little bite, how about you? Kids tend to be pretty messed up, especially when it comes to guilt. Whether it is the guilt of stealing, telling a fib, or some other negligible action, it can really mess with a kid’s mind. No one is more messed up than Osiris over killing a member of the suicide squad. What’s a demi-god to do? Any other guilt ridden kid would run off to confession, and everything would be cleared up with a couple of prayers, but I don’t think that’s going to work here.
Or – “Ohhh OHH! Thunderbolts ARE GO!” That is one uuuugly Venom. He actually looks like Sludge from the late, lamented Ultraverse, doesn’t he? This issue really amps up the volume on the violence, and gives us our first actual glance of the Thunderbolts in action, and I gotta tell you… Somebody in the government owes somebody in the private sector a HUUUUGE apology. I’m talkin’ huge. We do get to see the “Big Guns” concept in action on a villain scale, and it’s a bad scene, on a par with taking the brown acid. It’s your trip, man, but…
Or – “Why Do Ya Do Me Like You Do, Do, Do?” “Mary Sue: A pejorative term for a character who is portrayed in an overly idealized way and lacks noteworthy flaws, or has unreasonably romanticized flaws. Characters labeled Mary Sues, as well as the stories they appear in, are generally seen as wish-fulfillment fantasies of the author.” Why would I start off with THAT definition while reviewing Civil War: Frontline? Two words: Sally @#(*ing Floyd. From day one of this series, Sally has been an unusually annoying and omnipresent character, the central figure telling the “behind the lines” stories
Or – “A Book You Can’t Judge By It’s Cover…” Okay, I’ll say it. The Alex Ross covers for Justice Society have been bad. Really bad. And this month’s is creepy beyond creepy, with Maxine Hunkel looking remarkably like a young Olympia Dukakis, holding down her dress like Marilyn Monroe (showing a pretty adult amount of leg, hip, thigh and an apparent lack of supportive undergarments), with her hair floating up in the air. And while I understand that Alex Ross=Ratings, making the Dale Eaglesham covers (which have all been superior compositions, actually REPRESENTING what’s inside the issue, an archaic
Because hey, can’t leave a saga hanging now can we? One of the problems that comes with of having a day job (or two) is some things fall through the cracks until it is time to update the inventory in ComicBase and you suddenly remember, with dread, you forgot to review the final two parts of the Ultimate Spider-Man Clone Saga. Fortunately, for those of you who have been anxiously awaiting the final two issues, you now have an excuse to run down to the local shop and pick them up from the “why didn’t you buy this issue two
Or – “Back When Princess Python Was A Credible Threat… To Pastries.” There are few conditions in the English language that have more entertaining (and insulting) euphemisms than mental instability… Going ape, barmy, batty, berzerk, bonkers, certifiable, crackers, cuckoo, daft, delirious, demented, deranged, flaky, flipped out, haywire, insane, lunatic, mad, mental, moonstruck, nuts, positively fourth street, psycho, screw loose, screwball, touched, unbalanced, whacko, and let’s not forget “speed-dialling the bozophone” and “full-blown-wackaloon.” Granted, these are all very insensitive to anyone who has these sorts of imbalances, no matter how much fun they are, especially since the reality of the breakdown
Or – “This Is The End, Beautiful Friend… The End.” I admit it. I initially only bought this title because of the presence of X-51, aka Mr. Machine, Sir MacHinery, Machine Man, and Aaron Stack. One of Kirby’s lesser-known creations, the big purple guy with the taillights for eyes first bowed in the 2001: A Space Odyssey series in 1978, and has never actually had a run that lasted more than 12 issues consecutively. His “Space Odyssey” run was three issues, his first book, titled Machine Man, ran 19 issues, but there was a break of almost a year between