Archie Andrews may be the luckiest ginger nebbish in the universe, what with being back and forth between two lovely women for nearly 80s years (with the occasional moment of Cheryl Blossom, Sabrina or Val from The Pussycats to break things up, literally and figuratively.)  It’s probably crass to try and weigh the merits of the lovely politically active girl next door to the rich girl with the secret heart of gold, but it’s hard no to, to the point where Archie Comics even had an ongoing series devoted to parallel alternate futures where he married Ms. Cooper or Ms. Lodge respectively, leading to today’s keeping-it-wholesome query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) has searched the archives, and I’m frankly stunned that I haven’t asked this question before, asking: If you were Archie, would you choose Betty or Veronica?

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Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.

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