One of the joys of being a part of Major Spoilers is being part of a massive network of other nerds and assorted goobers who remember things that even my prodigious memory lost.  It happened on a recent ep of Top Five, when Rodrigo successfully identified a weird action figure of my youth during one of his entries, making it clear that what I remember as a He-Man knockoff was actually Stratos, a legit Eternian character.  There are a number of strange toys of the past (that I usually made up my own backstories for, like a Micronauts-clone called Metal Man who became the coolest G.I. Joe in my AT-AT) that I still vaguely recall, and I’m always surprised by the “I HAD THAT!” sensation that the internet gives me so often, leading to today’s clearance-aisle query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) is still a little bit confused as to how and why DC Comics okayed figures of Warlord and Swamp Thing before The Teen Titans and The Legion, asking: What weird action figure or toy of your youth do you still wonder about?

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Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.

13 Comments

  1. StellarLeader on

    Speaking about He-Man stuff, I had a Spikor action figure for some reason. The character appeared only in 3 episodes and I don’t think I actually saw any of them until I was an adult. The saddest part about all of this is that the spikes on the figure made it really uncomfortable to play with so I cut the tip of every single spike… yeah… I’m sorry for the heart attack collectors.

  2. PhegleysLament on

    Some of my favorite toys when I was 4-5 were the action figures based on the disastrous “Legends of the Lone Ranger” movie from 1981. They were the only toy line that I owned completely; probably because the movie was a flop and the toys were selling for next to nothing at the local dime store.

    • FINALLY! Someone else who had the Dragonheart toys!!

      At the time I initially got the figures, though, I had yet to see the film. I was just thrilled to have some nice looking dragon figures in the low price range. I was a little disappointed none of the other dragons were even really part of the film when I finally saw it after the VHS came out, but I loved the figures all the same.

  3. Lemmy Caution (@_Lemmy_Caution) on

    G.I. Joe’s Intruder dolls.

    WWII Military Vets suddenly vs. Space Caveman

    I loved it but… huh?

  4. I had the playsets from the movie “Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves”. I actually had several of them twice because most of them were retooled from earlier Star Wars releases (for example, the “Sherwood Forest” playset was the same as the Return of the Jedi Ewok Village playset).

  5. Robbie Warnock on

    So, I had this guy as a child. I never saw Battlestar at all and I was terrified of him. Once I even buried him in the garden because I didn’t want him in the house and my dad found him and dropped him on my dresser ((still caked in Georgia clay and dirt)) because he thought I lost him.
    I will never forget that purple, soil-smeared afro and those frog-like eyes……..
    https://www.toymania.com/334archives/battlestar/leader.htm

  6. Malone_hasco on

    I had several action figures which were kind of puzzling but none more so than Modulok from He-Man line. It was a two headed, sort of crab-like guy who literally was modular. You could take him apart from joints and assemble again in different ways. You need to see it to believe it.

  7. oh yeah, I had Modulok too. I liked pitting him against my little green army guys and assembling him really loosely, so i could flick off all the parts as the army guys landed a shot.

  8. in recent years, the gold standard “Why Did They Make This Figure” figure has to be “The Meat” from Rocky. https://www.amazon.com/Rocky-Asst-79008-Collectors-Series/dp/B001OI17LI

    as a kid though, the Toy Biz Marvel series had a few head-scratchers, like Deathlok, with his exposed brain. that was it, that was his action. his skullplate popped off and you could look at his brain. which would’ve been fun if paired with that talking Venom figure that said he wanted to eat your brains.

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