The Ultimate Weapon is a well-travelled bit of adventure fiction: From the Ultimate Nullifier that even Galactus fears to the Nintendo Power Glove of Green Lantern energy that Hal Jordan recently started wearing, every Ultimate bit of war machinery has its positives and negatives. 

F’rinstance, the giant laser cannon on the Death Star could destroy entire planets, but only when it wasn’t being used to direct the weekly broadcast of ‘Hee Haw,’ while Gunstar One’s Death Blossom could destroy everything in sight, but left the pilot disoriented and covered in barf, leading us to today’s ever-escalating query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) recently re-watched the climactic battle of the 35th Anniversary Super Sentai movie, where all the rangers transformed their mighty powers into a giant super-bazooka, which blasted the villain to smithereens (for a minute), asking: If you were a villain and/or monster, which Ultimate Weapon would you fear the most?


About Author

Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.


    • There is one thing I fear even more: The disappointment of a child. Not the kind of disappointment from a spoiled brat who didn’t get just the right version of a toy for their birthday, but that soul crushing sad disappointment when you do something that shakes an innocent kid’s very core, such as accidentally letting slip that this or that character isn’t real while the kid is in earshot and you just don’t notice.

  1. That creepy song from the Smurfs Christmas special.
    When little blue gnomes can literally sing the evil out of you, it is time to hand in your eeeeevil and join the Thunderbolts….

  2. The Point of View Gun, as designed by Deep Thought, commissioned by the Intergalactic Consortium of Angry Housewives, who were tired of ending every argument with their husbands with the phrase: “You just don’t get it, do you?”

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