As the release date for “Star Wars: The Force Awakens” grows nearer, it’s becoming clear that the location of Luke Skywalker is going to be one of the plot-points of the new film.  Is he lost?  Gone to the Dark Side?  Subletting Yoda’s tiny shack thanks to high galactic real estate prices?  Most of us will be able to find out in a week or so, but right now, I’m thinking about all the cool unseen possibilities.  Is Luke selling used ships on Tattooine?  Hanging out with Boba Fett, making amends for that whole Sarlacc incident?  With the full power of the Spoilerites in play, surely we can come up with something cool for him to have been doing, leading us to today’s power-converting query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) has a theory involving time-travel and a vat of chemicals at the Atlas Playing Card Company, leading to a rivalry with Gotham City’s defender, asking: How would YOU best answer the question, ‘Where is Luke Skywalker?”


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Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.


  1. Last I saw, he was in jail in Central City. No, wait, that’s not it….

    How about this: He realized that by taking down Jabba, he became the defacto leader of his criminal underworld, and has been running it ever since. Luke is now the Space Godfather.

  2. “Skywalker? I heard he tried to upgrade his hand and ended up with an oversized fist. He died his hair yellow, and went on a villainous rampage until he was stopped by two stoners.”

    “Nah! After defeating the empire, he returned to his home planet of Hyperion, to try to end a civil war with the help of an Earth submarine crew captained by that shark guy.”

    “Don’t listen to those mooks, son! Here’s the real scoop! That Skywalker kid went full-robot, and merged with C-3PO. He’s now calling himself ‘Larry’ and with a guy called Buck travels through the time-stream keeping it safe for all mankind.”

    “I heard he finally succumbed to the Dark Side, and now spends his days fighting a kid and five robot monkeys for some backwater planet in the Empire called Shuggazoom.”

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