As an aficionado (though hardly an expert, since nearly all my knowledge came from old Marvel Comics) of 70s pop culture kung fu, I was quite amused by the sorta-hidden joke in the movie ‘Kung Fu Panda’:  Each of the members of the Furious Five represents a traditional martial arts style.  Crane, Mantis, Monkey Snake, and Tiger style are real disciplines of martial arts, and it’s kind of a shame that there isn’t a Panda Style, as I think I might be good at it.  (I’ve got a build similar to Po’s, after all, and my Jack Black impersonation is pretty strong.)  Still, it brings to mind the question of what other animals or insects might inspire a fighting style.  What would Armadillo style combat consist of?  How might you incorporate the Nuthatch into your school of kung fu?  Indeed, the question of who could master the deadly Texas Prairie Chicken fighting style is quite the quandary, which leads to today’s ancient, secret query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) would probably enjoy starting the super-dangerous Diplodocus-style method of combat, requiring massive girth and a teensy brain, asking: For which creature would you name your theoreical signature kung fu style?

The Author

Matthew Peterson

Matthew Peterson

Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture!

And a nice red uniform.

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  1. Michael
    March 1, 2015 at 11:38 am — Reply

    Turtle style, the old master was the best in the movie.

  2. TheWolverine
    March 1, 2015 at 12:16 pm — Reply

    I find it difficult to choose just one over another because each one lends themselves better to different situations. So, having said that, I choose the Jackie Chan style or in other words the style that works in most cases better than others.

  3. Mark
    March 1, 2015 at 12:26 pm — Reply

    Sleeping Sloth style. :D

  4. Alisha
    March 1, 2015 at 12:49 pm — Reply

    Back when I did practice martial arts (before I lost use of my legs), I nicknamed my particular style “Chimera” because I practiced a bit of a mix of different styles (and I thought it sounded cooler than MMA).

    But if I were to create my own style, I’d probably name it “Tiny Kitten” style because you’ll look so cute and helpless, but you can still do a surprisingly extensive amount of damage. Or possibly “Wolpertinger” just because it sounds cool (and is almost like a chimera of sorts).

  5. Rolina Eldis
    March 1, 2015 at 8:07 pm — Reply

    The opossum style. When danger strikes, I pretend it had already struck me!

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