As a life-long fan of professional wrestling, I love occasionally dipping into the well of squared-circle history for Major Spoilers purposes, if only to let the cynical snarkers get some meanness out of their system.  It reminds me of a discussion I had with a professional sportscaster around the turn of the century, wherein he admitted to enjoying the spectacle and athleticism of the entire affair, but when asked why he wouldn’t cover it in his segments had the perfect response: “I don’t cover movies about football, either.”  He also had a theory that a wrassler like The Rock would be perfectly suited to playing a superhuman in real life, a prediction that eerily presaged the Rock’s eventual action movie career.  For me, I’d peg WWE lifer and company man Kane, aka Glen Jacobs, for my real-life super-duper, combining as he does a massive build and unexpected agility with a sharp mind (follow him on Twitter @JacobsReport if ya don’t believe me), which leads us into today’s pre-scripted query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) wonders if ‘Referigerator’ Perry and Sergeant Slaughter ever had long talks about their old gigs in the G.I. Joe personnel transports, asking: What real-life athlete do you think would make the best superhero/supervillain?

The Author

Matthew Peterson

Matthew Peterson

Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture!

And a nice red uniform.

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6 Comments

  1. Hannah Jones
    June 7, 2014 at 12:03 pm — Reply

    Can I still say El Santo and Blue Devil. I mean, they’re just that fucking awesome!

  2. mark
    June 8, 2014 at 9:11 am — Reply

    I find the guy somewhat dull but I do have to say for the down the line super hero John Cena, here’s why in real life gives a lot of time and money to charities, great with the kids. and he;s a nice guy so power should not mess him up much

    • June 8, 2014 at 11:14 am — Reply

      Plus, think of how much his villains will hate him! Lex Luthor Vs. John Cena would be a hoot.

      Also, Faithful Spoilerites, any athlete of ANY stripe is eligible, not merely wrasslers.

  3. Clubberlang6
    June 8, 2014 at 12:24 pm — Reply

    Manute bol. I can see him taking on the undertaker.

  4. June 8, 2014 at 8:24 pm — Reply

    I can’t get past the diva to answer the question. I should know who it is but for the life of me can’t place that beautiful face.

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