In the 1980s, Burt Reynolds and Dom DeLuise brought to us the concept of ‘The Cannonball Run’, a cross-country road race where a bunch of wacky types rounded up their vehicles and raced across the United States for fun, profit and cheap innuendoes.  It’s a concept that has a lot of potential in today’s world, with the option of Speed Racer trying to out-muscle the Batmobile and Herman Munster slam-shifting his way past Bo Duke while B.A. Baracus curses them all out.  It’s the kind of premise that begs our daily query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) is gonna get Cledus “The Snowman” Snow and those 18-wheels a-runnin’, asking: What fictional driver (of a land vehicle, let’s not get Han Solo crazy with Kessel Runs in here) would you pick to win the 2014 Cannonball Run?

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Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.

13 Comments

  1. Jake Tanner (Jan-Michael Vincent) from Damnation Alley. In his Landmaster of course. He could just run over everyone.

  2. Well I would like to say “Skid” Mark McCormick in his Coyote X from Hardcastle and McCormick. But I think it would have to be Michael Knight and K.I.T.T. With super pursuit mode and the armored body they would have the ability to shrug off anything anyone would through at them.

  3. If there’s an extensive city driving component involved, I’d have to say it’s a toss-up between DeNiro’s Sam from “Ronin” and Matt Damon’s Jason Bourne with an honorable mention for Charlize Therorn’s Stella Bridger from “The Italian Job” (remake).

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