Since the earliest days of comic books, there have been a few naming conventions that have popped up over and over: The [Colored] [Noun]; [Noun]man & [Noun]woman; and more and more in recent years, [Random Meaningless Adjective].  But perhaps no example of nomenclature has gotten quite as much usage as the permutations of the honorific Captain, from Captain Atom all the way to Captain Zephyr with stops along the way at America, Marvel and Planet.  Of course, comics aren’t the only place one finds that particular form of address, with Captain Video, Captain Kirk and more lining the halls of science fiction.  But, when it comes down to it, each of us has our own opinions of how, f’rinstance, Captain Han Solo might fare matched up with Captain Mal Reynolds, or whether Captain Fate can take down Captain Fear (though most of us wonder who Captains Fate and Fear actually ARE).  This, in turn, begs a query…

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) is torn between Action, Ultra and Crunch, asking: Who’s the best Captain of ’em all?

The Author

Matthew Peterson

Matthew Peterson

Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture!

And a nice red uniform.

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28 Comments

  1. SmarkingOut Adam
    December 28, 2013 at 12:09 pm — Reply

    Captain Britain. I loved Excalibur and I’ve enjoyed his other appearances as well.

  2. Dino
    December 28, 2013 at 12:43 pm — Reply

    Captain Jack Harkness. He is by far my favorite companion of The Doctor.

  3. Creigh Brigman
    December 28, 2013 at 12:58 pm — Reply

    The Captain from How I Met Your Mother.

  4. Metaphysical Cake
    December 28, 2013 at 4:29 pm — Reply

    After getting caught up on Agents of SHIELD episodes this week.,.. Captain Morgan.

  5. Mauther
    December 28, 2013 at 4:37 pm — Reply

    As much as I love the Captain Nationals (America and Britian), I am partial to Capt Mal Reynolds.

    • Rob
      December 28, 2013 at 6:56 pm — Reply

      Seconding the vote for Captain Tight Pants.

  6. December 28, 2013 at 6:55 pm — Reply

    If you had asked this question prior to “Torchwood: Children of Earth”, I may have said Captain Jack Harkness. But after what he did, I no longer see him in anywhere near the same light as I once did.

    So I guess I’m torn between Captain Marvelous, Captain Pollution (the evil duplicate of Captain Planet) and Captain Carrot.

  7. December 28, 2013 at 8:06 pm — Reply

    Vote for Captain Jean-Luc Picard.

  8. Ian
    December 28, 2013 at 8:10 pm — Reply
  9. December 28, 2013 at 8:16 pm — Reply

    The one and only (except for reboot) Captain James Tiberius Kirk

    • Bob
      December 29, 2013 at 5:55 am — Reply

      He’s got mt vote too!

  10. December 28, 2013 at 9:21 pm — Reply

    How has no one said Captain Nemo yet? A gentleman and a badass!

  11. Mike C
    December 28, 2013 at 9:29 pm — Reply

    Captain Marvel!
    Which one?
    Yes.

  12. December 28, 2013 at 11:18 pm — Reply

    The Captain from Nextwave. He was so dedicated to being “a Captain” that “By his own admission, he used to go by Captain ☠☠☠☠, a moniker so offensive that when he met Captain America, the Avenger beat him severely and left him in a dumpster with a bar of soap in his mouth. The Captain used a lot of codenames as well, all of them starting with ‘Captain’, and had to abandon them all because someone else was already using them. In Nextwave #7 he mentions that he had to pay a “marine-looking melon farmer” to even use his current codename.” (Thank you Wikipedia.)

  13. December 29, 2013 at 1:20 am — Reply

    I’d have to go with Robin Williams in dead Poets Society.
    also, kangaroo.

  14. Neal Peters
    December 29, 2013 at 4:41 am — Reply

    No votes for Captain Birds-Eye? Shame on you. ;)

  15. johnnyjagwani
    December 29, 2013 at 8:58 am — Reply

    Space Pirate Captain Harlock

  16. Kirby
    December 29, 2013 at 9:55 am — Reply

    Captain Sisko from Deep Space Nine.

  17. Oldcomicfan
    December 29, 2013 at 11:16 am — Reply

    Captain Crunch. It doesn’t get soggy in milk.

  18. HipHopHead
    December 29, 2013 at 1:40 pm — Reply

    Champion City Captain Amazing (you’re a “moron”…to think of anyone else).

  19. December 29, 2013 at 3:07 pm — Reply

    I second Captain Kangaroo. Decent, funny, hung out with a moose. Awesome. I spent 30 minutes every morning with him for several years.

  20. Jerm
    December 29, 2013 at 5:53 pm — Reply

    Id have to go with Captain Zapp Brannigan. “hard and fast”

  21. clubberlang6
    December 29, 2013 at 9:56 pm — Reply

    Captain picard!!!!!

  22. AED
    December 30, 2013 at 7:38 am — Reply

    I have to go With Capt. Mal. Not only did he have a level head a love for his crew, but had 3 seriously sexy women on his boat. Each their own flavor of awesomely hot.. That alone gets him in.

    • December 30, 2013 at 10:10 am — Reply

      Out of curiosity, who didn’t make the cut? River Tam?

      • AED
        December 30, 2013 at 4:00 pm — Reply

        River was pretty to be sure. She sometimes seemed childlike and I never thought of her in same way as the others killer ladies. No disrespected intended.

  23. Jason
    December 30, 2013 at 11:19 pm — Reply

    Captain Zapp Brannigan: I got your distress call and came here as soon as I wanted to.

  24. January 4, 2014 at 1:56 pm — Reply

    Captain Kirk

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