I was a little surprised, upon a recent viewing of ‘The Empire Strikes Back’, to discover that Yoda’s trademark speech patterns were less mangled than in his most recent appearances.  (He still sounded pretty much like Grover, though.)  The little green Jedi isn’t the weirdest speaker in the annals of pop culture, though, as the Scissormen from Grant Morrison’s Doom Patrol were as verbally disorienting as they were visually disturbing and the title character of V For Vendetta’s vernacular vaguely vexes vigilant viewers via voraciously variant vocabulary.  And imagine how much worse Ted Striker’s day might have gotten had Beaver’s mom not been fluent in jive!

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always, “misquoted”) talks funny, but yo, I’m makin’ money, see, asking: The most strangically funniest pop-culture talking is from who, hmm?

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Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture! And a nice red uniform.

16 Comments

  1. Dr. Mordin Solus from Mass Effect 2 & 3. He’s a super genius medical researcher who talks like he’s taking shorthand notes. And don’t get me started when he starts performing Gilbert and Sullivan musicals.

  2. Mass Effect definitely had its share of strange talkers. My favorite was the big snuffleupagus-without-trunk Elcor, though the Hanar were a close second.

    Probably my all-time favorite is HK-47 of KOTOR fame. Meatbags indeed!

  3. Doctor Dinosaur from Atomic Robo. To paraphrase Doctor Dinosaur (Because I don’t remember the exact quote off the top of my head): “Aside from everything going catastrophically wrong, everything is going exactly as planned!”

    Atomic Robo himself isn’t too shabby, either, what with sayings like: “I used my violence on it!” and “You brought a gun to a robot fight!”

  4. Phillip J. Fry, who brought us such gems as “scare-roused” and made the big brain say such things as “I am the greetest” and “Now I am leaving Earth for no raisin!”.

  5. How about the adults in the animated Peanuts cartoons. The muffled trombone still cracks me up, for no apparent reason, every time I see/hear it. And the occasional reference made to this in other shows or media, usual in the context of a character ignoring another character’s dialogue is even funnier to me.

  6. Leaving off a one shot like “All your base are belong to us,” I’d have to say the Groaci from the Retief stories. Five eyestalks, sticky fingers, short legged, long torsoed Argyle socks and Bermuda shorts wearers. Their language allows only nouns, nominalizations, and infinitives. “The admission of defeat,” or “To put one’s hands up, to attempt no hasty actions.”

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