Year ago, in my long-lost radio days, a friend and I spent a particularly dull afternoon disagreeing vehemently on what Springsteen meant when he wrote “wrapped up like a douche, another runner in the night.”  (Len was absolutely wrong, by the way, as the lyrics clearly say “Held up like a loofah by the foreman of the night.”)  This morning, while returning from the grocery store and listening to me sing along to the radio, the child wanted to know what Sting meant when he sang “Now I know my local purple song.”

The MS-QOTD (pronounced, as always “misquoted”) is waiting for Harold Angel to sing, asking:  What are the funniest misheard lyrics (often known as “Mondegreens”) you’ve ever run into?

The Author

Matthew Peterson

Matthew Peterson

Once upon a time, there was a young nerd from the Midwest, who loved Matter-Eater Lad and the McKenzie Brothers... If pop culture were a maze, Matthew would be the Minotaur at its center. Were it a mall, he'd be the Food Court. Were it a parking lot, he’d be the distant Cart Corral where the weird kids gather to smoke, but that’s not important right now... Matthew enjoys body surfing (so long as the bodies are fresh), writing in the third person, and dark-eyed women. Amongst his weaponry are such diverse elements as: Fear! Surprise! Ruthless efficiency! An almost fanatical devotion to pop culture!

And a nice red uniform.

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25 Comments

  1. June 6, 2012 at 12:59 pm — Reply

    It’s alright
    It’s alright, alright
    Shamoo the mysterious whale

  2. June 6, 2012 at 1:16 pm — Reply

    Not me, but my mother thought the line about “I screen my phone calls” in No Doubt’s Spiderwebs was “I scream my clothes off”. Made the song rather interesting.

    And on the subject in your picture, my disco-hating father was *horrified* to learn one of his favorite country songs was written by Robin Gibb. Made my day, that.

  3. Ashen
    June 6, 2012 at 1:16 pm — Reply

    “There’s a bathroom on the right.” (There’s a bad moon rising.) — CCR’s Bad Moon Rising

  4. Henry Laman
    June 6, 2012 at 1:22 pm — Reply

    “I mean, who needs such distractions when your sister’s such a babe” (ending theme song of well known podcast)

    • Slappy
      June 6, 2012 at 5:14 pm — Reply

      Seeing as all three gentlemen have sisters, which one are they referring to?

      • June 6, 2012 at 6:22 pm — Reply

        Which, indeed…

        • June 29, 2012 at 3:58 pm — Reply

          Very late posting, but oh thank you I’m not the only one who heard that for YEARS.

  5. Belmont
    June 6, 2012 at 1:28 pm — Reply

    CCR’s Bad Moon Rising. “Don’t go out tonight. It’s bound to take your life. Take the Bathroom to the right. Right Lyrics: Don’t go around tonight Well, it’s bound to take your life
    There’s a bad moon on the rise

  6. June 6, 2012 at 2:04 pm — Reply

    Chumbawumba’s “I get knocked down, by an elephant”

  7. June 6, 2012 at 4:14 pm — Reply

    As someone who is technically deaf (I can actually hear somewhat, just not very well and certain tones not at all), I’ve often misheard lyrics. One summer I thought the opening lyrics to The Offspring’s song “Come Out and Play” was:

    “Got a deep refrigerator”

    There was also a point when I thought The Monkees song “Auntie Grizelda” was called “Panty Grizelda”.

    But nothing cracked me up more than when my goddaughter (6 or 7 at the time) asked me if the United States was founded by witches. She pointed out what she thought was a line in the Pledge of Allegience:

    “And to the republic for witches stand”

  8. Slappy
    June 6, 2012 at 5:09 pm — Reply

    Pussy, Pussy Good.
    Pu Pussy Real Good.
    Salt n’ Pepa Push It

    as a preteen, I was shocked to hear it on the regular radio and more shocked that my mom had no reaction to hearing it.

  9. Xian
    June 6, 2012 at 5:47 pm — Reply
    • Oldcomicfan
      June 7, 2012 at 6:58 am — Reply

      Oh, that Carmine Burana video it priceless!!! I spews my Apple Jacks all over the keyboard!

  10. June 6, 2012 at 6:25 pm — Reply

    I’m gonna break…
    I’m gonna break my…
    I’m gonna break my rusty cage!!! ERROR!!

    • June 7, 2012 at 1:57 pm — Reply

      Hey that’s what it sounded like to me, it’s not my fault Chris Cornell doesn’t articulate. My wife used to like AC/DC Dirty Deets and the Dunder Chiefs and of course there’s the classic Manfred Mann…Blinded by the light, wrapped up like a douche, he’s the foreman of the night.

      • June 7, 2012 at 1:59 pm — Reply

        Dirty Dean and the Thunder Chief! Also, I’m a fan of the old-school “you come do my census.”

  11. Nick S.
    June 6, 2012 at 6:58 pm — Reply

    Just like a one-winged dove
    Sings a song just like she’s sinking
    Ooh, baby, ooh
    Say ooh.

  12. June 6, 2012 at 7:39 pm — Reply

    The Go-Go’s classic song “Islands of Seals”
    Any of the 300 variations on Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves (my brother and I thought it was “Kids, please, Gramps needs cheese.”)

  13. Forresst!
    June 6, 2012 at 7:46 pm — Reply

    Dance! There’s nothing left for me to but Dance! Yeah all these bad times I’m going through just dance yeah, got candy in my heels tonight baby…

  14. June 7, 2012 at 2:46 am — Reply

    What I Heard: My Speech is gonna be affected
    What She Said: My STEEZ is gonna be affected
    -“Your Love is My Drug” Ke$ha

    Worst part? It would make so much more sense the way I had it. What the hell is a Steez? Why will it get affected? And What will happen?! Explain Keh-Dollar-Sign-Ha!

  15. Space Cadet Juan
    June 7, 2012 at 3:02 am — Reply

    “‘Scuse me, while I kiss this guy”– Jimi Hendrix during his experimental phase.

  16. Gary
    June 7, 2012 at 3:39 am — Reply

    “Please don’t step on the Lion, no” Steve Miller Band

    • Gary
      June 7, 2012 at 3:41 am — Reply

      Also “Alex the seal” by the Go-Gos

  17. Oldcomicfan
    June 7, 2012 at 6:54 am — Reply

    Angel of the Morning: Just Call Me Angel, in the morning, baby – Just brush my teeth before you leave me, darling (just brush my cheek is the correct wording)

  18. John
    June 7, 2012 at 9:25 am — Reply

    A friend heard a song while shopping and claimed that the refrain was “and god sent gravy.” The next few months I was pestered with questions about what the correct line was. We eventually found out that the song is K D Lang’s “Constant Craving.”

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