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  1. ikdks
    August 23, 2011 at 3:24 pm — Reply

    Antilife = all beef patty + all beef patty + special sauce + lettuce + cheese+ pickles + onions + sesame seed + bun – exercise – lipitor…

    • August 23, 2011 at 4:23 pm — Reply

      And yet Darkseid is order Quarter Pounders instead of Big Macs… that may explain why he’s angry and the JLA needs to intervene

    • seneca
      August 23, 2011 at 10:18 pm — Reply

      The special sauce is Thousand island dressing. Pass it along.

      • ikdks
        August 24, 2011 at 9:32 am — Reply

        Victoria’s secret is that she was born Victor.

    • August 25, 2011 at 7:41 am — Reply

      The true Anti-life equation.

  2. Will
    August 23, 2011 at 3:54 pm — Reply

    so this is definitely another earth as the New Gods were all killed off once by Starlin and again by Morrison

    because the editors at DC couldn’t coordinate to save their lives

    • August 23, 2011 at 4:05 pm — Reply

      Keep in mind the first run of JLA takes place in the past…

      • TaZ
        August 23, 2011 at 4:20 pm — Reply

        Stephen, just trying to wrap my head around that one sentence has given me a headache. It’s like the past, but not really the past we know. Well some of the past we know but some of it’s changed. But not all of it. Just the parts of the past that weren’t selling as well and are horrible to make movies from. But the other books are “current” but not really current but current with some changes like Superman broods and no longer wears his underwear on the outside and Batman has been wearing a codpiece for like forever. And there were short capes and no Wally West and no Justice Society but it was pretty much the same except for the things that are different.

        Dang thing sounds like the plot for a Dr. Who arc.

        • August 23, 2011 at 4:22 pm — Reply

          It’s the past, but an all new better past…

          • TaZ
            August 23, 2011 at 4:28 pm — Reply

            And here I was thinking that the earthquake today was the DCU relaunch. (In all seriousness I’m about 150 miles from the epicenter and that was some SERIOUS moving! I’ve now been in the eye of a hurricane, an F-2 Tornado, a blizzard and now an earthquake. I only hope they have lighter gravity on the world my rocket ship sends me to so that I can have a towel for a cape and brood.)

          • Pantsthemonkey
            August 23, 2011 at 5:54 pm — Reply

            I was still a bit confused, so I went and got our pal Doc Brown to help explain. Take it away, Doc.

            Doc Brown – “Imagine that this line represents time. Here’s the present, 1985, the future and the past. Prior to this point in time, somewhere in the past, the timeline skewed into this tangent, creating an alternate 1985. Alternate to you, me and Darkseid, but reality for everyone else.”

            Make sense?

      • DMC
        August 23, 2011 at 7:06 pm — Reply

        I thought it was the first issues

        • DMC
          August 23, 2011 at 7:07 pm — Reply

          correction issue

      • Lando
        August 24, 2011 at 5:03 pm — Reply

        yea that clarifies things right up. We still don’t know what stories count.

  3. J Michael T
    August 23, 2011 at 5:40 pm — Reply

    Funny that a recent podcast discussed not wanting to have Darkseid as a villain for a while…

  4. Exmalakite
    August 23, 2011 at 6:17 pm — Reply

    And here I was hoping for a really good Starro story….

    • ~wyntermute~
      August 23, 2011 at 6:42 pm — Reply

      Sorry, but I’ve never read a good Starro story… ^_^ (I’m biased though, because I think mind-controlling starfish aliens are kinda gross & lovecraftian, and I’m not into tentacled-or-tentacle-like things.)

    • Frank
      August 25, 2011 at 8:06 am — Reply

      Speaking of Starro, what ever happened to the humanoid Starro designed by J.G. Jones? Did it get washed away in the relaunch?

  5. The Great NateO
    August 23, 2011 at 7:43 pm — Reply

    If he gets a Diet Pepsi with that he will be OK.

  6. Michael
    August 23, 2011 at 7:52 pm — Reply

    With JLA being set in the past I’m gonna go out on a limb and predict that this will be Darkseid’s first foray into the NuDCU.

  7. brenton8090
    August 23, 2011 at 8:17 pm — Reply

    Everything’s different. Past, present, and future. everything is what they tell us it is. Just go with it. You’re arguing continuity when they’re resetting everything. They keep what they want, and lose what they don’t. It’s what’s going to allow them to tell the best stories: if you don’t get all nitpicky and tie their hands with years of continuity. Don’t try to “fit it in”. Just go with it. It’s all new. It is whatever they say it is. Whatever they tell us, that’s the new status quo. Forget the past. Lets move on to some cool new stories.

    • TaZ
      August 24, 2011 at 8:52 pm — Reply

      In other words, drink the Kool-Aid?

      • Brenton8090
        August 24, 2011 at 9:01 pm — Reply

        Not exactly. What I’m saying is, if you’re going to drink the Kool-Aid, quit bitching about the flavor. You can always switch to Marvel-brand Flavor-Aid.

        • TaZ
          August 25, 2011 at 9:41 am — Reply

          I don’t like Marvel-brand Flavor-Aid. It’s got that nasty bitter after-taste and the little sediment that doesn’t dissolve floats on the bottom of the glass.

          And the “reality” post was simply fun sarcasm as to the way that DC’s going forward with this. Truth be told, if they really didn’t care much they would have pulled a “Russo” and just said “Screw it. We’re starting all over starting now.

    • August 24, 2011 at 9:00 pm — Reply

      Exactly and the best most positive way to look at it. Too many are jaded and well past this hobby.

  8. August 24, 2011 at 2:09 am — Reply

    This is the sort of Villian that requires a Justice League to form around.


  9. Oldcomicfan
    August 24, 2011 at 8:09 am — Reply

    Well, at least Darkseid didn’t use the Boom Tube to drop into the ladies locker room at the YWCA…

    • Michael
      August 24, 2011 at 10:14 am — Reply

      Be a heckuva scene. “Excuse Darkseid, ladies.” And he’s go a pair od undies on his head as he leaves.

  10. TaZ
    August 24, 2011 at 1:43 pm — Reply

    All I know is that the cartoon made me hungry.

  11. wdchefdave
    August 25, 2011 at 2:26 pm — Reply

    Once upon a time there were five heroes.
    Wonder Woman
    Martian Manhunter
    Green Lantern
    Aquaman and The FLASH!
    (No Superman. No Batman.)
    They were called The Justice League of America, and they premiered in a “The Brave and the Bold” comic book.
    Starro looked kinda corny and I was five years old reading it in a barber shop.
    (I loved Martian Manhunter and Aquaman right off!)
    If the JLA are going to be re-launched… let us not forget ALL the past!!!
    Remember when they kept putting Black Canery in for Wonder Woman after the “Crisis” and it never worked.

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The Author

Stephen Schleicher

Stephen Schleicher

Stephen Schleicher began his career writing for the Digital Media Online community of sites, including Digital Producer and Creative Mac covering all aspects of the digital content creation industry. He then moved on to consumer technology, and began the Coolness Roundup podcast. A writing fool, Stephen has freelanced for Sci-Fi Channel's Technology Blog, and Gizmodo. Still longing for the good ol' days, Stephen launched Major Spoilers in July 2006, because he is a glutton for punishment.

You can follow him on Twitter @MajorSpoilers and tell him your darkest secrets...