The 80s gave us kids who didn’t fit in until something extremely strange happened to them to make them cool and fun.  The 2000s gave us kids who didn’t fit in until something extremely strange happened to them to make them cool… and angsty.

Entering into the ring this week is one Scott Howard, awkward teen until the light of the silvery moon unleashes his genetic code turning him into TEEN WOLF.  Also entering the ring is one Jacob Black, who… uh… crappit, never seen the movies, have no interest in it but he is TWILIGHT WOLF!

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FIGHT! Teen Wolves Edition - Who would win in this fight?

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25 Comments

  1. Scotty takes this one to me. Just because the people in camp Twilight say that over grown German Shepard is a werewolf doesn’t make it so. Besides, I’m not a fan of pedophilia and would prefer a teenage boy not take romantic interest in a new born baby. Just saying.

  2. Have you seen the muscles on the twilight kid? He could crush teen wolf’s head like a grape (then go pine for babies)

  3. While as a preference I prefer the more wolf-like werewolf, on PRINCIPLE I cannot vote for Twilight in any competition. Plus Teen Wolf is one of those movies I try and watch once a year.

  4. Now I have no idea where this baby talk is coming from, I’ve never seen any of the movies, I did read about half of the fist book out of curiosity, and I have to say, that they are not for me, after all I am a man, and have never been, or wanted to be a teen age girl…..”So I got that going for me which is nice.” That being said, teen wolf for the win!! Better movie, better actor playing the wolf, and DEATH TO THE TWI-TARDS!!!

  5. Lets see, one of them I would hunt down, skin and turn into a throw rug and the other is a beloved character from a lighthearted comedy played by one of the funniest man ever… Not exactly Sophie’s Choice here.

  6. See, already I don’t like this poll. Asking who would win in a fight is already missing the point.

    Who would win in a game of one-on-one? That’s far more important.

  7. Scott not only car surfs, he is white boy…wolf boy that can jump. He gets the slutty blonde and the homely girl. Booth vs Bela? Weird. The the main reason Scott wins is because you have lost your stash, he can sniff it out for you.

  8. I refuse to participate in this one. I think that the twilight werewolf would kill the hair boy from the campy (but funny movie). However, as I classify Twilight in the same category as Pokemon (a safe girl firendly nerdish activity that brings the rest of us down) I can not vote for Jacob. First and hopefully only POW that I will ahve to abstain from.

  9. Wolf versus wolfman, easy choice. The fact that scott howard has use of his hands and can fashion tools would give him an advantage.

  10. Going with a wolf man because you get best of both worlds I would guess. As I don’t recall this movie and I haven’t seen Twilight or read the source material I’m just going on what seems likely. IF you have the reflexes of a wolf but keep your man shape, I think you would win out.

  11. I vote for teenwolf, mostly because if he couldnt take the twillight chump I’d help him out by throwing a chair into the ring, or driving the twillight kid over with a steam roller….. which ever was closest.

  12. thedexter102 on

    Steven, I will gladly give you a long list of reason why Twilight is actually a very good movie. And Jacob would own Marty McFly hands down.

    • Well, you are closer to the target audience then most of us… I’m not saying you’re a 13 year old girl but you are younger then most of us. I’m guessing early/mid teens?

      Anyway the Ed and Jacob guys have the acting skills of a manequin and Bella(character) is basically a sad, pathetic little girl who has no self respect or self steem and can only value her life depending on who her boyfriend is.

      I love Buffy, Wonder Woman, Firefly, etc. Female leads should be more then stereotypical damsels in distress or trophies for the guys to win, while chicks dig the whole “knights fighting for her honor” (feminist most love this franchise) the Twilight saga reads to me as “which of the old pedos is finaly gotta gets his hooks on the poor, dumb girl?”

      • thedexter102 on

        Well yes I am closer to the target audience age wise and in terms of my circle of freinds.

        I think Rob inhabits the charecter quite well and is the only constant lead charecter. I think your right about Taylor however.

        But Twilight is otherwise an inteligent look at teenage sexual frustration and Abstanance. New Moon lets the side down a bit and I havn’t seen eclipse yet. You seem to be the only one not making perv jokes. Good on your open mindedness.

  13. Well, One is real (a fairly athletic kid with a LOT of makeup), and the other is pixels. All one has to do is wave a magnet…

    Besides, how could one NOT vote for Marty McFly.

  14. Against M.J. Fox, NEITHER whats-his-sparkly or pedo-wolf have no chance. He steals the hearts of Bella and every other chick – hell, half the guys too – in the Twilight Series. That’s my vote.

  15. I have no interest in seeing the twilight movies either, so maybe it would be easier to think of it a little different. I know Stephen and Matthew both have a kid, so they might have seen other “Taylor” movies. Make it “Shark Boy” vs Marty Mcfly. Mcfly All The Way!!!!!!, haha

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