It is I, the whimsical Wade Wilson, wishing you a wonderful warning (Thatâ€™s not too much alliteration is it?) â€“ Buy Deadpool #900, with seven all new stories, my first team up and more!Â It seems like only yesterday I was starring in Deadpool #13, but here I am, at the apex of comic glory!Â This issue is so big only the most hardcore Deadhead (Isnâ€™t that the name for fans of the Grateful â€“ Shut Up!) creators could handle it!Â In the first of seven stories, â€œPinky Swearâ€, is presented by Joe Kelly and Rob Liefeld.Â â€œOne Downâ€ is brought to you by Charlie Huston and Kyle Baker and â€œClose Encountersâ€ is created by Jason Aaron and Rick Staggs.Â Mike Benson and Damian Scott deliver â€œShrunken Masterâ€ while Fred Van Lente and Dalibor Talijic present â€œSilent But Deadly.â€Â â€œWhat Happens in Vegasâ€ is told by Duane Swierczysnki (Is that how you spell it?) and Shawn Crystal.Â And lastly, we have â€œGreat Balls of Thunder on the Deep Blue Seaâ€ by Victor Gischler and Sanford GreeneÂ Watch as your favorite crimson comedian faces off against probe-happy aliens (They didnâ€™t even offer us a drink!) and killer mimes (Did their guns have silencers? Bwahaha)!Â But the fun doesnâ€™t stop there, I also meet a shrink thatâ€™s crazier than me (Youâ€™re crazy?) and partake in a heinous assassination (My favorite type!)!Â Bear witness as I wade through (Get it?) the trials and tribulations that every average psychopathic regenerating cancer-ridden red spandex-wearing mercenary assassin has to deal with! And look at that cover by Dave Johnson (I know, itâ€™s so awesome, eh?)â€”and heâ€™s doing a variant cover too!
Marvel and I have agreed that if retailers donâ€™t check their orders on Deadpool, I will be sad. You wouldnâ€™t like me when Iâ€™m sad (No more of my issues that sell out every single time ever!)!Â Guns (Guns!), chicken, aliens, mimes, battery cables, and guns (Guns!), ARE YOU NOT ENTERTAINED?Â Buy Deadpool #900, starring me, the Merc with a Mouth, immediately when it comes out (Twice!)!