This Just In:  At Least Steve Rogers is Still Dead!

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I really had to go when I got home, and fortunately it gave me time to read Final Crisis #7.  Where better place to read the final chapter of Final Crisis than on the crapper? It seems fitting as morrison appears to have crapped out another story that relies a great deal on you knowing everything there is to know about the DC Universe as he takes everything Kirby ever created and gives it a place to call its own.  And like a good bowel movement, Final Crisis #7 has a few moments that makes one feel really satisfied.

Oh yes, Dear Reader, hold on to your hat, as we bring you a Major Spoilers filled look at Final Crisis #7.

The first thing readers will need to know when reading Final Crisis is this; you better make time to read this issue really slowly, and plan on reading it a couple of times.  Maybe even 20.  Not because it is that awesome of an issue, but rather it will take you that long to really get your mind behind what grant morrison is doing.

The most problematic part of this issue is the jumpiness of the story.  There are moments when you believe at least part of the Final Crisis story takes place in two separate universes, but were lead to believe it was the same universe, and then there are moments when it appears that readers are simply being jumped around in time and space, without the protection of Th Doctor of the TARDIS.

For example, there are panels that clearly show the remnants of New Earth (consisting of the Titans Tower, the Fortress of Solitude, and what I took to be portions of the Watchtower) floating in space surrounded by the final essence that is Darkseid.  These scenes take place after the death of Darkseid, when Superman is trying to power the Miracle Machine.  Then there are panels that show a fully restored Earth that is still quarantined by the Oans from the first issue when Orion was killed.  Those panels take place during and after the powering up of the Miracle Machine.

Confused?  You aren’t alone.

To make matters worse, the floating in space city Earth has Lois Lane and Jimmy Olsen printing the last copy of the Daily Planet inside the JLA trophy room, where we clearly see displayed Batman’s Cowl, Hawman’s headdress, and Wonder Woman’s grotesque mask she’s been wearing since issue #2, yet a few pages later, readers see Wonder Woman destroying the mask just before Darkseid dies.  The continuity confusion abounds and makes me want to run down the street screaming for a dose of the drugs grant morrison is taking.

The interesting thing about what morrison is doing in this issue, and presumably since Seven Soldiers, is trying to pay homage to Jack Kirby by ushering in the Fifth World. By series end, however, we don’t get to see the Fifth World gods emerge, but rather we get to see everything Jack Kirby created get transported to Earth-51 – the very same universe that was destroyed (twice?) in Countdown to Final Crisis.  There is a moment in Countdown where readers see the remains of that universe coalescing, and a single flower starting to bloom.  Here morrison uses Nix Uotan’s narration to explain Apokolips being reborn as New Genesis, and Kamandi and the rest of Kirby’s DC creations (including the Fifth World Forever People and Sonny Sumo) being transported to Earth-51.  And what of Etrigan, mr. morrison?  Is he also on Earth-51?

And in the process of moving the last survivors of New Earth to Earth-51 via the Black Gambit maneuver, Lord Eye freaks out, collapses the Mother Boxxx created boom tube (it’s got three x-es because morrison is three times as intense as a single x) causing Hawkman to make the ultimate sacrifice to save the people.  It’s such a short montage readers may miss.  That’s okay though, as I  only know a few people who are going to be upset at the loss of a character who’s history is more screwed up than a time traveling immortal.  At least Geoff Johns now has another hero to resurrect during Blackest Night to shamble along zombie style to wreck havoc in the next big event.

Also in the span of a single panel, Aquaman returns – and then does absolutely nothing.

Feel free to scream along.

If you want your Crisis filled with heroes from various worlds standing around and doing very little, then this final issue is for you.  Not only do we get to see Superman standing around as Mandrakk and the vampire Ultraman exchange pleasantries, readers are also treated with the arrival of the Supermen of the Multiverse, the Green Lantern Corps, the Angels of the Pax Dei, and Captain Carrot and crew.  That’s right, CAPTAIN FREAKIN’ CARROT!

Then Hal Jordan drives a spike through the heart of Mandrakk.

It seems like this would be a fanboy’s wet dream come true as the Nix Uotan led force defeats the enemy… if only it all made sense.  I thought Darkseid was the big bad?  No?  Guess readers had better get a copy of Superman Beyond 3D #1 and #2 to see what the heck is really going on.

It all seems so frenetic that the moments featuring Barry and Wally streaking through the scene with the Black Racer on their trail seems almost like an afterthought.  I did, however, like how morrison dealt with the backwards firing bullet, and Darkseid’s death by time travel.

I also found it interesting that this final crisis really isn’t even a crisis for our heroes, or the multiverse, but the final crisis for the monitors of the 52 worlds who end up getting wiped out of existence.  It is a great moment that reminds readers of the closing pages of Crisis on Infinite Earths were Lois, Kal-L, Superboy, and Alex Luthor disappear into the pocket universe.

By the end, the most shocking moment of Final Crisis isn’t that the multiverse has been saved and lesser heroes have been lost, but the fact that grant morrison pulled a fast one on the DC readers by revealing that Batman is still alive.  Granted, he’s stuck at the beginning of time, watching Anthro pass away while he scratches his bat symbol on the wall, but at least it lets readers know that morrison will now spend the next year telling everyone the whole RIP was a “thrilling ride” and it was planned that way from the beginning.  And he would probably be right as the cover to the first issue featured the same cave drawings Bruce Wayne is working on in the final page.

I will admit I had a moment’s hope on the last page as I tried to comprehend everything that was presented in the final splash panel, but after that moment passed, I must say I was quite upset.  For months now, DC has hyped the “death of Batman” only to laugh like a little school girl at how foolish readers are to have believed the lie.

I seem to remember a tale of a boy who cried wolf so many times that eventually it came back to bite him on his ass (literally).  For those wondering what is next from DC it’s going to go like this A) Battle for the Cowl will be followed by B) Blackest Night, which will then be followed by C) Doc Brown showing up at Wayne Manor shouting “You’ve got to come with me Dick!  We have to get Batman Back to the Future (for the next crisis)!”  (cue Huey Lewis music)

Now, I’m sure there are many of you out there who are already firing up your “Well Duh!  Did you actually think DC would really kill Batman!  Jeez!  It was only a matter of time before he showed back up, moron!” comments.  To those with a jaded view of the world, I would like to point you to Marvel.  Now, I don’t read that many Marvel comics, but there is one thing I do know for sure – when they kill someone, they ain’t back by the next issue.  When Steve Rogers was murdered, the same lot of you proclaimed he would be back in six months.  Two years later, you’re more than happy with Bucky as Cap, and it doesn’t look like Steve is returning anytime soon.  Will Steve Rogers return?  Perhaps, but now that the “successful” transition to Bucky has been accepted by most fans, Steve Rogers doesn’t ever have to return.  If DC really wanted to borrow a play from Marvel’s play book (and really, Marvel’s book has been open for all to see for a couple of years now), the company would have kept Batman’s death a secret until it was ready to play that hand.

When Final Crisis was first announced, the only clue grant morrison would give readers is that it begins with Anthro (the first boy on Earth) and would end with Kamandi (the last boy on Earth).  Now that everything has concluded, morrison is going on the record to say that there were never any rewrites (even though there are indications that there were), it is just the story evolved.  He also goes so far as to proclaim the lateness of the series is no fault of his own, but rather that of lackadaisical (but brilliant) artists.  Way to hide a jab in a compliment mr. morrison, you truly know how to play the game.
The Good

  • Batman is still alive
  • Hawkman is dead once again
  • The multiverse remains intact

The Bad

  • Batman is still alive
  • The story jumps a lot in this issue – if you have ADD, better make sure you have your pills handy
  • Backwards firing bullet explained
  • Where the heck is morrison’s beloved Animal Man?

The Ugly

  • There’s a whole lot of meh and huh? going on in this issue and the series as a whole.

Fool me once, shame on you.   Fool me twice… well, your sales are going to drop after that one.  Much like Marvel’s Secret Invasion, I think many readers are going to feel jaded over Final Crisis to the point they aren’t going to buy into the major event titles much longer.  Final Crisis #7 is an interesting read to say the least, and while it does take multiple readings to get the timeline right and figure out what exactly is going on, it isn’t the worst thing I’ve ever read.  Final Crisis #7 gets 3 out of 5 Stars, which is high praise coming from me.

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08/08

The Author

Stephen Schleicher

Stephen Schleicher

Stephen Schleicher began his career writing for the Digital Media Online community of sites, including Digital Producer and Creative Mac covering all aspects of the digital content creation industry. He then moved on to consumer technology, and began the Coolness Roundup podcast. A writing fool, Stephen has freelanced for Sci-Fi Channel's Technology Blog, and Gizmodo. Still longing for the good ol' days, Stephen launched Major Spoilers in July 2006, because he is a glutton for punishment.

You can follow him on Twitter @MajorSpoilers and tell him your darkest secrets...

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63 Comments

  1. Jizzle
    January 28, 2009 at 10:32 pm — Reply

    i consider myself to be fairly intelligent person, but i guess i dont have the necessary degree in gibberish to understand this issue, but after reading this review its starting to make sense

    • January 28, 2009 at 10:40 pm — Reply

      Keep in mind I’m not giving away every plot point and detail and there are still moments that still don’t make sense to me until I read it for a fourth time (the time stopping and starting bit). Perhaps in the collected volume, readers will be able to suck the metatext out of what morrison is trying to do (implying the monitors suck the fun out of comics much like obsessed comic fans, while nix represents those who see the big picture and just roll with the fun).

  2. Rowan
    January 28, 2009 at 10:40 pm — Reply

    I kinda wanted batman to really be dead but we I knew in my heart of hearts he would not be dead but does that mean He will come back ? or is he gonna be a artist

  3. gilbert
    January 28, 2009 at 10:58 pm — Reply

    i didnt feel that jaded after secret invasion. in fact, i thought it was a very good set up for dark reign

  4. January 28, 2009 at 11:41 pm — Reply

    Maybe it’s better as a collection/trade, but I can only rate Final Crisis as good. Not great. Not awesome. Just good. I will give Morrison kudos for throwing sooo much stuff in there w/ it making some sense, but it just wasn’t a “Crisis”. It was something on a grand scale (that suceeded in some places while failing in other places), but not the mouth-dropping sort of thing this was hyped up to be. Mandrakk??? Mandrakk???? Libra is soooo scary/powerful then Luthor fires a shot and PFFFT. WTF????

    All the tie-ins were a waste if DC’s intention was for them to actually connect to the core story.
    (LOVE Legion of 3 Worlds!) If it was DC’s intention to just make $$$$, then mission accomplished.

  5. nu
    January 29, 2009 at 1:27 am — Reply

    i feel like so much happened but that i didnt get to see anything. these are comics, i would like to see more of the story, not have it told to me.

    dont get me wrong, i understand making the reader think and fill in some of the blanks but at the end of the day i am not getting paid to write comics, instead i am paying to read them and i would like to be treated as such.

  6. Casaloki
    January 29, 2009 at 1:53 am — Reply

    Batman still alive: We don’t need to time travel, because Bruce knows there’s a Lazarus pit out there somewhere. Good luck finding it Bruce…..

    Lo3W rules, Smallville has a Legion and DC stops the series. Instead, they bring crappy Aquaman back. Haha, thanks for a good laugh DC, but I think it’s time to move on for me. Final Crisis was your last chance to win me back, but that’s it, folks.

  7. Chris
    January 29, 2009 at 4:41 am — Reply

    Batman’s at the end of time. Not the beginning.

    • January 29, 2009 at 7:50 am — Reply

      Chris, you are wrong. That would be Anthro dying by the fire – Anthro being the First Boy on Earth, putting Batman clearly in the past.

  8. alex
    January 29, 2009 at 8:14 am — Reply

    This series really makes you want to quit collecting

  9. Ricco
    January 29, 2009 at 8:16 am — Reply

    Cue tv music “when in time, is Carmen Sandiego?” Worse of all in Final Crisis 1 we see the 3 logos of the trinity so we know Supe and Wonder Woman’ll get to Bruce. Heck he might be resurrected at the end of “Trinity” for all we know

    Final Crisis: an even SO BIG, everything remains the same… lame!

    So the monitors are erased, so what about the Anti-Monitor who plays an important role in Blackest Night? He’s the power source of the Black Power Baterry, last I checked the universe/antimatter universe needed balance so when the first monitor was created so was the anti-monitor. That leaves an open door for at least 1 Monitor to return, making Final Crisis completetly without impact…

    I liked Final Crisis: Revelations much more.

  10. Katzedecimal
    January 29, 2009 at 8:46 am — Reply

    After re-reading it a few times, I have to wonder if Morrison didn’t reset the DCU (again), and mayyyyybe wipe out a lot of Didio’s bad decisions of the last four years? Yeah yeah I know but I can hope, I’m hoping so hard these little blue tykes offered me a job and some bling :-P If that IS what Morrison did, I might have to forgive him.

    I’m with Ricco, FC: Revelations was much more interesting.

  11. eric
    January 29, 2009 at 8:47 am — Reply

    Well, even though i have not read the issue yet, I am very disappointed in DC. The first Crisis was wonderful. The second one had meaning. This one was crap. It was confusing from the beginning. DC has burned me with this one and also 52 and Countdown. They wont get me again. I will just read the titles I buy and get things in TPB. Too bad for you DC.

  12. Ricco
    January 29, 2009 at 9:07 am — Reply

    This Crisis didn’t even make it to my top 3, and that’s saying alot since there are only 3 Crisis…

    Infinite Crisis may not have been as good as Crisis on Infinite Earths but at least it made sense (and was fun, the battle for Metropolis was bad-ass) and gave us an actual hero dead in Conner Kent even One Year Later gave new readers a nice jump in point. But what does Final Crisis gave us? The Battle for the Cowl? That would hvae made more sense if RIP had stayed in Batman comics.

    My guess is that Marvel has so many big story lines linked to one another to create One Year Later like jump in moments.

  13. January 29, 2009 at 9:20 am — Reply

    Bring on BATMAN: BC. At least now we’ll figure out how he got a dinosaur in the Batcave.

    Honestly, as a former DC mark, I’ve dropped nearly all the books I was reading and the more Blackest Night descends into DC Zombies In Space the more books I want to drop.

  14. crood
    January 29, 2009 at 9:27 am — Reply

    The Batman revelation reminded me of the Superfriends episode when Aquaman and a couple of others were trapped in the past. They found the future site of the Hall of Justice, buried Aquaman’s communicator, and set it to send an emergency signal shortly after they left the present.

    Are you telling me Morrison’s Batman can’t think of something the Superfriends’ version of Aquaman could?

  15. Roger
    January 29, 2009 at 11:18 am — Reply

    ok having read infinite crisis, Identity crisis, Crisis on infinite earths, 52, countdown to infinite crisis, the first 5 Final Crisises, Batman RIP, and the 2005 international Building Code. I have no f-ing clue what you wrote or how to follow

  16. matt
    January 29, 2009 at 11:18 am — Reply

    I find it hard trying to figure out who Final Crisis is geared to. I read alot of DC and I was lost for 90% of the story. Does Morrison answer to someone? This is honestly the worst thing I’ve read since Onslaught back in the 90s…I have never missed cheesy formulaic comic boo story telling more then after reading final crisis 7.

  17. Bob S.
    January 29, 2009 at 11:34 am — Reply

    Actually when Steve Rogers died in the mid nineties, after a good year’s worth of stories of him being sick, they brought him back in 5 issues with the Cosmic Cube.

  18. Nick
    January 29, 2009 at 11:35 am — Reply

    Stephen,

    I think that was actually Kamandi at the end of his life, since the rocket with the artifacts from the watchtower is there. This of course gives Bruce the means to escape the Omega Sanction.

  19. January 29, 2009 at 12:01 pm — Reply

    Nick: No you are wrong. That is Anthro – the first boy.
    Check what morrison said in an interview:
    Grant Morrison: The A was Anthro and the Z was Kamandi. First Boy to Last Boy, with the whole DC Multiverse in between. In the end, as I got really into the story, it changed shape a little and now concludes, as it began, with the First Boy, now an Old Man.

  20. rob g
    January 29, 2009 at 12:11 pm — Reply

    This series as a whole was the most devastating comic event to ever happen to me in my entire comic collecting life which has now been 30 years long!! It was the most poorly conceived, and written piece of garbage I have ever had the displeasure of buying. DC comics has been walking a fine line of mediocrity for a long time and now I can say without a doubt… I will never purchase a comic written by DC again. Thank you DC for 7 issues of inane, overpriced, sloppy comic book fire starter.

  21. Graciela
    January 29, 2009 at 12:26 pm — Reply

    It was horrible, just not AS horrible as past issues. I agree that there was too much time jumping and I really couldn’t tell what was what and WHEN was when. For a minute it looked like it was just a story Wonder Woman was telling some kids. And I really didn’t understand how all of a sudden she was okay and not a fury anymore. Mandrakk was hella lame. I mean, just really cheezy Bram Stoker’s Dracula lame. It really did feel like nothing happened and characters made cameos for the sake of keeping it a DC comic.

    Now, the scene with Batman. Someone else mentioned that it was at the end of time but you’re saying that it was at the beginning of time. But don’t we see that “message in a bottle” that Lois Lane launched in the same panel with the old caveman? Or did that thing launch into the past too?

  22. January 29, 2009 at 12:34 pm — Reply

    Unless morrison is implying that Anthro lived from the beginning of time to the end of time – which would make him the greatest immortal of all time (which I doubt) then yes, something is seriously screwed up with that rocket. Again, it makes absolutely no sense.

  23. ~wyntermute~
    January 29, 2009 at 12:44 pm — Reply

    Eek. I have nothing else to say that is either relevant or true or unique.

  24. Dr. Bolty
    January 29, 2009 at 3:14 pm — Reply

    I don’t know why, but I get a kick out of your refusal to capitalize grant morrison, Stephen.

  25. ~wyntermute~
    January 29, 2009 at 3:43 pm — Reply

    I read the exit interview, and it confirms something I have suspected for a while now… “If you don’t understand what I am writing, it is your fault (not mine for being incomprehensible). Oh, and my poops do not stink.” says G-Mo, though not in so many words.

  26. Salieri
    January 29, 2009 at 4:08 pm — Reply

    I liked it.

    I don’t care what anyone else says – whether I need to be on drugs, or am some sort of elitist, or whatever.

    I liked it.

  27. January 29, 2009 at 4:09 pm — Reply

    Dr. Bolty: morrison has earned a permanent demeaning lower cap going forward.

  28. January 29, 2009 at 4:12 pm — Reply

    Salieri: no one said you had to hate it. If you liked it, then great, at least someone did. I’m just not sold on the whole “morrison is our savior, and I’ll jerk it to him every moment I can” mentality of his legion of followers who believe he can do now wrong. I’d prefer to point out the emperor has no clothes. But there are some who do get it and do enjoy it, and if that is you, then welcome to the social. Frankly, I’m surprised there aren’t more people out there jumping down my throat on why this is the greatest thing since sliced ice cream. So far, you are the only one who has stepped forward to say you like it.

  29. Salieri
    January 29, 2009 at 4:28 pm — Reply

    Eh, I don’t say the man’s without his faults (personally, I can never ever sit through a straight reading of “JLA: One Million”. It Just…just, argh), but then again there are, as you said, some rather good bits too. I just don’t take things as seriously as everyone else seems to. I’d be perfectly happy if Morrison become the new EiC-for-life, or if he descned into being ‘That Weird Vertigo Guy’ once more; it’s not likely to affect anything except the comics I read, and even those don’t take up a large percentage of my conscious mind. So why worry? Tomorrow is always another Crisis.

  30. MaximusRift
    January 29, 2009 at 8:37 pm — Reply

    Let’s just leave it at : “Everyone has different tastes, but Morrison is still a tool.” ;p

  31. January 29, 2009 at 9:49 pm — Reply

    Finally! A review of FINAL CRISIS #7 that I agree with 100%! There are some great moments in the book, but since I didn’t pick up SUPERMAN BEYOND 3D #1 or #2, I was, more often than not, confused and frustrated and frankly, lost.

    It felt like a test of my knowledge of the DC Universe instead of an exciting and entertaining piece of art. As you said, multiple readings will clear some things up for me, but I’m not a guy who enjoys having to do homework so that I can fully appreciate a story filled with characters I’m already extremely familiar with.

    That said, I really enjoyed the attempt. I’m all for breaking new ground and telling a story in a fresh and exciting way, but I should know the basic story elements after my first read.

    Great review!

    P.S. Thanks to your suggestion, I’ll definitely bring FINAL CRISIS #7 into the bathroom with me if I’m ever… not feeling… “regular.” :)

  32. Julian Drew
    January 29, 2009 at 10:04 pm — Reply

    Hopefully DC will realize that this wasn’t such a hit after all, despite sales for the title, and make it up to their fans by getting WB to shell out major bones and get Bendis on their side … or, apologize profusely and hand out the dollahs for Moore to come back … get Gaiman to write more … and realize that although Morrison can indeed write great things, he isn’t actually the medium’s version of Shakespeare. Then again … Cliff notes are sometimes needed for ol’ Will, lol, so maybe DC should put those out for Morrison! (Of course, if they would be anything like the Director’s Cut of Final Crisis #1, I’d still be left wondering what had happened.)

    I’ve been reading comics for 30 years, and like someone else has stated, I can deal with high concept, but when it is just a mess disguised as such, and alienates the reader … I mean, I’m intensely aware of DC continuity, and I felt completely alienated, it just upsets me to say the least.

    I like aspects of the series, and I like the fact that **SPOILER** Captain Carrot was restored to form, amongst other things, such as the concept of the Monitors being comic book fans, and that the hardcore ones might be wise to just take in a bigger picture and not freak out so much when something doesn’t go their interpreted way. Unfortunately, it’s difficult to just go with the flow of things when there doesn’t seem to be a flow to begin with.

    I’m adamant that you can’t have DC without Marvel, nor Marvel without DC. I believe that both companies have pros and cons, and both contain heroes and villains that *make* the genre. I’m not a fan of Joe Quesada; I find him arrogant and an overall jerk, and I don’t like how “Disney” Marvel has gotten with regard to inserting Nike ads into panels and what have you (for example,) but I do appreciate that I can pick up a title and get a sense of what it’s going to be about; I can pick up a title, and I can get a recap of what’s needed to know what lies ahead.

    I really wish DC would do that, or like in recent issues of “Supergirl”, bring back the “see issue …”. However, even with that, I’m not sure I’d have enjoyed Final Crisis.

    In comparison, Secret Invasion was also just another set up for a big event, and I found it had a rushed ending, BUT it at least was done well, and in a way that one could follow what was happening. I’m not sure if it was that more accessible to one who hadn’t an idea of past Marvel continuity, but when I read it, I didn’t feel like throwing up from trying to comprehend what was in front of me.

  33. iJ0ker
    January 29, 2009 at 10:32 pm — Reply

    This whole series left me with a bad taste in my mouth that I can’t describe. Confusing, alienating, bizarre, and in the end? Utterly pointless. I’m a DC guy and I know my history, but Final Crisis was just a mess; nothing made any sense. I think that between this and Batman RIP, morrison’s rep and cred has taken major hits and it’s clear he doesn’t belong being mentioned in the same breath as Johns, Bendis, Moore, or Miller. I sincerely hope this really is the final crisis because I’m sick of them.

  34. rob g
    January 29, 2009 at 10:47 pm — Reply

    what was amazing to me about this series is that it actually angered me! no comic has ever done that before. I have collected poorly conceived limited series before and simply filed them away. this was a complete ball drop by a company that has repeatedly gotten worse with it’s writing, meeting of deadlines, and pricing. $ 4.50 for $#@^$! Superman Beyond??? Keep your freakin 3D glasses and give me a damn cohesive storyline! This was not over the top creativity, this was sloppy production. When comics started to hit the 2 dollar mark I started to get a little more critical of what I was purchasing, and now that they are approaching the $ 5.00 mark…screw it! DC obviously thinks they can put out anything and make money from it, so they can have my $ 4.50 for final crisis # 7 – it will be the last money I spend for a DC title. Good Job Grant!!!

  35. E-MAC
    January 30, 2009 at 2:01 am — Reply

    Let me first congratulate you Mr. Schleicher on not being one of the countless brainwashed Morrison drone reviewers who have tried to pass off this mess of a comic as great writting. It’s nice to know that not everyone who reviews comics is driking the Morrison kool-aid and is calling FC out on all it’s faults. This was a debacle of epic proportions reading this made me think that Zero Hour was a great story, hell Amazon’s Attack had a better plot then whatever drug induced stupper Morrison indulged in while writting this. The best thing about it is that it’s over and hopefully it will be forgotten and retconned out of continuity as soon as possible I can only hope.

  36. kevin
    January 30, 2009 at 6:05 am — Reply

    I loved the series!

    No need to explain why. So I guess sorry for those who expected the same kind of Crisis. :)

  37. rob g
    January 30, 2009 at 8:04 am — Reply

    it’s not about expecting the same crisis, it’s about a comic company that can’t get it’s $#!* together for the biggest event of the year. it’s about not planning the project better to give the reader what they paid for. Justice was a simple plot line yet was written in twelve issues… final crisis was a gargantuan plot line crammed into 7 issues with much sloppier art. Has the Legion crossover even been completed yet?

  38. rob g
    January 30, 2009 at 8:15 am — Reply

    just looked it up…no it has not been completed yet, but I am gonna go out on a limb and guess that Superman doesn’t really have to much trouble with Superboy Prime, and he definately does not bring him back to help fight Darkseid…How could I possibly know that unless I had already read the conclusion of the series in Final Crisis #7!!! AARRGGHH! What do I do with my completely irrelevant Legion of 3 Worlds now? If anyone has any suggestions beside wiping my butt with them let me know ( that one is too obvious! ).

  39. Maurice Fleury
    January 30, 2009 at 11:12 am — Reply

    Ok, I got a college degree and a good steady job.

    Until now (picture myself in the can reading Final Crisis 7 or Final hemorrhoidal Crisis 7 because I have just spend two hours trying to figure it out), I thought that I was an OK, blue collar kind of guy who could easily comprehend math, chemistry and physics during high-school. However I have just discovered that I don’t know nothing at all (sh**), literally speaking.

    I am sorry Grant Morrison but the final episode of Final Crisis is as confused as the “string theory”. A shameful display of way too many jumps and terrible lines as well as a history that simply doesn’t really convince or make sense for that matter.

    It seems that you may be suffering from Quesada’s syndrome or a similar malady. Take two aspirins and call me tomorrow when you rewrite the whole Final Crisis. And by final it means that it is over and it is not subject to any “to be continued” stuff.

    We don’t need 52 “Annoyverses”, stick with two, one for the “new generation of readers” and the other for the “old generation of readers”. On one time will be respected, heroes will die and new ones will be born, on the other heroes will be as Gods and readers will be treated like garbage for the sake of profit.

    Sincerely

    A fan (my name is up there!)

  40. Maurice Fleury
    January 30, 2009 at 11:13 am — Reply

    PS: Speaking of monkeys and typewritters.

  41. rob g
    January 30, 2009 at 3:04 pm — Reply

    well said Maurice…well said

  42. ~wyntermute~
    January 30, 2009 at 6:09 pm — Reply

    Rob: I had been wondering if I somehow missed LegionX3’s last three issues too. I was simply too disheartened to really look for the answer. Thank you. :) I think I read somewhere that Geoff Johns has plans for that pertaining somehow to the Lightning Saga (which has yet to be resolved; another dangling plot thread o’ doom), but take that with a grain of salt ‘cuz I don’t always properly remember everything I read on the intarwubs.

  43. rob g
    January 30, 2009 at 8:16 pm — Reply

    Yeah…DC will probably pull the same crap with Legion of 3 Worlds that Marvel pulled with Ultimate Hulk VS Ultimate Wolverine! You know there’s some writer in the DC office with this project on his desk like,” are you serious?! I gotta finish this crap? Why me? Have Grant do it!! What?? He’s eating mushrooms again? Damn it!!”.

  44. mosdef
    January 30, 2009 at 11:02 pm — Reply

    I honestly believe if Marvel had put some crap like this out. Stephen would have given it 1 star, but since its dc he has a soft spot for them

    • January 31, 2009 at 10:02 am — Reply

      mosdef: No I would have been just as fair with Marvel as with DC.

  45. Peyz
    January 31, 2009 at 12:44 am — Reply

    I think this was Morrison’s weakest work ( after his superman beyond ). There were just too many plot-holes in the narrative. I’m sure his general idea and direction for FC was great. But he should have left the more detailed writing like panels, dialogues, … to other writers like Johns who would not want to write a weird tale just for the sake of being weird !!!

    The deaths of two major league characters ( Batman & Darkseid ) in FC was mishandled quite badly. It would have been more grand and befitting the occasion if the two killed each other instantaneously … rather than having Darkseid go on talking, walking and jiving panel after panel, page after page , then fighting with supes and …… .
    It sort of made Batman’s death in Vain & insignificant!!! That’s no way to treat comic-dom’s most popular character’s supposed death.

    I feel totally let down by FC, which last year promised to be a magnificent event from the promos and predictions. It had so much potential … but in the end, was mishandled and ended up as just one of those events you just forget or deem unnecessary.
    No crisis ought to be deemed unnecessary. Afterall this is the same company that gave us the fantastic “Identity Crisis”. What happened to you all, Mr. Dido ?

  46. Ed
    January 31, 2009 at 1:10 pm — Reply

    What happened to green arrow, black canary and mr terrific? Alive or dead?

  47. RichT
    January 31, 2009 at 1:45 pm — Reply

    Salieri I’m with you all the way. I hadn’t read Stephen’s review until today, I checked out the reviews on CBR 1st after I read it.

    I loved it and this series as a whole.

  48. RichT
    January 31, 2009 at 1:57 pm — Reply

    Stephen Schleicher “When Steve Rogers was murdered, the same lot of you proclaimed he would be back in six months. Two years later, you’re more than happy with Bucky as Cap, and it doesn’t look like Steve is returning anytime soon. Will Steve Rogers return? Perhaps, but now that the “successful” transition to Bucky has been accepted by most fans, Steve Rogers doesn’t ever have to return.”

    Stephen didn’t Marvel show Steve Rogers in a tube or something shortly after Bucky took over? Can’t remember exactly what he was in, it has been a while since I read The Death of Cap volume 1 or 2. If they did wasn’t that very similar to DC showing Batman in the end of #7? They gave themselves a way back to Steve if sales didn’t fly with Bucky. I happen to like Bucky better but only pick this up in trades. Batman never died the Omega sanction did not kill him. He will be gone but will return in time. I don’t think DC/Didio/Morrison ever said he’d be gone for good. At least not in any interviews I’ve seen or heard.

  49. Brother129
    January 31, 2009 at 5:30 pm — Reply

    If Doc Brown shows up at Wayne Manor in the Delorean I will definitely by that comic….

  50. Piper
    February 1, 2009 at 7:31 am — Reply

    Did anyone ever explain how Final Crisis fits in with the entire Death Of the New Gods storyline, or is that just another thing we’re supposed to forget about? Heck, I’m still trying to puzzle out how Countdown (to Final Crisis) has anything to do with Final Crisis. Any help? Maybe a big article with charts? Please?

  51. Matt
    February 1, 2009 at 10:25 am — Reply

    Seems to me that I’m not alone in feeling that this was another in a long line of Grant Morrison’s confusing, convoluted epic messes. Maybe I’m just not smart enough to figure out what he was trying to do. Or maybe Grant should lay off the halucinogens for a bit. Is it too strong to call for Dan Didio’s job? And one more thing- DC had better realize that Geoff Johns, not Morrison, should have been given the keys to the kingdom a long time ago . . .

  52. oraclebop
    February 2, 2009 at 5:15 am — Reply

    It really would’ve been better with Gail Simone on it.

  53. Steven Talbot
    February 2, 2009 at 1:29 pm — Reply

    Okay so er…what? What on Earth was that all about then? And did Batman die onboard an exploding helicopter or did he escape and sort of star in Final Crisis? And then die again? And get sjunted to the past? What? WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    Crap.

  54. Bob S.
    February 3, 2009 at 3:19 pm — Reply

    Steven read the issues of Batman following Batman RIP to get the answers on how he showed up in Final Crisis.

  55. Bob S.
    February 3, 2009 at 3:20 pm — Reply

    Steven read the issues of Batman following Batman RIP to get the answers on how he showed up in Final Crisis.

    As for people having a problem with how he survived not being shown, do they get pissed whenever Joker is used after Batman 429?

  56. ~wyntermute~
    February 3, 2009 at 5:36 pm — Reply

    Anybody who disliked F.C. should get their hands on Tiny Titans #12 for a MUCH better take on the whole Crisis thing… Man, I bwah-hah-hahed like I haven’t since the Guy Gardner/Booster/Beetle days of the JLA.

  57. Greg C
    February 4, 2009 at 9:45 pm — Reply

    I read all the Final Crisis books and have no idea what happened. I think Morrison dropped some acid, typed this garbage up, and gave it to DC who think, “Oh I was just given Holy Scrolls by the God Morrison!. Let’s publish it because everthing he poops out is great”. So, without an editor to tell him, “What the #$#$? We not going to publish this crap because no one knows what the hell is going on, they let him do what ever he wants. If this was a TV show, it would have been cancelled by the third show. I will never buy another Morrison book again. For all you people who like 8 issue epics, try Jim Stalin instead. Rann-Thanagar Wars was an enjoyable read.

  58. February 21, 2009 at 11:30 am — Reply

    I read the comics I buy.
    Lately, I wonder how these people actually get writing jobs.
    I had to read this series over and over again just figure out what was going on.
    I did not have this problem with Crisis On Infinite Earths.
    To be perfectly frank, this series was awful. A waste of money and time and effort. I have no idea what excatly happened in this idiotic series, much like its counterpart Marvel’s Secret Invasion, and I do not care to have to purchase titles I do not collect to find out how the story goes. I have been collecting comics for over 25 years now and have never seen such drivel spooged out onto a series than this. This was no way as memorable as Crisis on Infinite Earths and I have to agree with the review, its a read for the crapper.
    This series seems to be designed to make the reader purchase every other title in the DC Universe just to keep up. I have had my fill of both DC and Marvel doing the ‘X-Men Drama’ to all their comics. It’s bad enough the series stunk but to have to get more titles just to understand what the heck was happening is a simple sales gimmick. I’ve seen this too many times in X-men and it is a major turn off.
    What was the point of this series?
    THERE’S NOTHING FINAL ABOUT IT.
    It directly went against what happened in ‘The Death of the New Gods’ and it seemed to contradict those titles that didn’t run with this drivel. The artwork was as jumbled as the story. What was trying to be said here?
    Was it a story about the monitors?
    Was it a story about the New Gods?
    Was it a story about the multiverse?
    Who was the major villain?
    The death of Batman was yet another DC gimmick to make you purchase all the upcoming ‘Battle for the Cowl’ series anyway. I wish they would stop DOING THIS!
    Who the frak is running DC comics now? They must be on the same subsatnces that Marvel has as both companies seem to be tied up in mutual convoluted, contradicting, and contrasting messes in all their titles.
    Darkseid was horribly underused. Libra was overused. And please, the use of a vampiric Monitor was a pure and simple slap in the face to comic readers. Mr. Morrison, please do not insult my intelligence, you must have had some idea behind this travesty but I will NOT be purchasing any ‘Director’s Cut.’ Trees are weeping now for the waste of paper this garbage was printed upon. Crisis on Infinite Earths opened up a brand new and exciting age for DC comics.
    Final Crisis was like pouring acid on a bleeding wound.
    It was just NOT consistant.

  59. avatar
    May 3, 2009 at 8:58 pm — Reply

    I just finished reading DC’s Final Crisis series from issue #1 to issue #7.

    What a pathetic mess. I think the overall plotline… where Darkseid and the New Gods characters take human form and take over the DC Multiverse to create a 5th World (since the Kirby New Gods stories are referred to as the 4th World) is a good plot, but this series was just a mess.

    It was a bunch of little cameos and mini battle scenes that didn’t make any sense to the overall plotline at all, the stuff with the Monitors was just another mess and the ending…

    Superman just wishes it all back to normal? How lame is that.

    As if the series itself wasn’t bad enough… Barry Allen is back somehow? They never even bother to give a comic book reason why he is back… he just shows up.

    And the Death of Batman… Batman is alive and well in the last panel, so we know he isn’t dead before they even begin their ‘Cowl’ series this year.

    After Identity Crisis the bar was raised up pretty high. It is a real shame that Grant Morrison can’t write his way out of a paper bag (even if you gave him a sharp pen).

    I was all set to start picking up the little connecting mini-series (Rogues Revenge, etc.) and instead I’m just going to get them in hardcover via Amazon.com in the fall since Amazon has them for about half off cover price.

    Lame series, lamer ending. And who was that Villian at the end? Did they even bother to explain who he was? Nope. He just shows up, much like the Flash.

    DC should be hanging their heads in shame.

    Oh well, at least it wasn’t Skrulls.

  60. narwhal
    July 26, 2012 at 6:48 pm — Reply

    Why do all these comic fans seem to WANT their heros to die? I’m new to this, sorry if I’m missing something (which I clearly am).

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