Or – “We’re Filth! We’re Filth! We Come From Filth, We’re Going To Filth! We’re Filth!”
AnybodyÂ know why Ms. Marvel is getting pawed by walking $#!+-men?Â
Previously, on Mighty Avengers:Â Iron Man and Captain America formed the New Avengers together, with a careful balance of heroes who… um…Â would make Marvel the most money, to be frank.Â Either way, that went south quickly, as Captain America was assassinated, Wolverine was overexposed, Spider-Man was busy at the divorce firm of Boucher, Likes, McFadden and Mephisto, attorneys at infernal law, and all the good second tier characters had those pesky morals.Â So, when he decided to create his new and improved MIGHTY Avengers, Iron Man got Ms. Marvel, her best friend, Hercules’ brother, two girls in black leather who may have led the Avengers once, and a man in yellow spandex who won the “S” Heavyweight Title.Â Okay, I kid…Â Sentry’s probably more of a bantamweight, honestly.Â Either way, after a “Venom Bomb” coated most of New York in symbiotes, the attack is linked to Victor Von Doom.Â Iron Man and his amazing friends set out for Latveria with the intention of taking Doctor Doom into custody, but a freak time machine accident left I.M., Doom, and manic-depressive Clark Kent trapped in the past.Â A loophole in Sentry’s backstory got them back to the future, only to find out that Doom was gone, and Ms. Marvel was rushing in to warn them…Â But it was too late, as a massive explosion consumed Castle Doomstadt, and seemingly annihilated Iron Man!
We begin this issue as we did the last, with Morgan Le Fay in the 13th century, slaving over a hot cauldron of toadhead or newt testes or somesuch, as her suitor demands that she help him build an army.Â She turns to Victor Von Doom, and wonder why he can’t gather his own men.Â “NOT of men,” Doom replies, and Morgan smiles.Â “Would you use this army in this time or your own?” she askes pointedly, and Doom replies that he would never hurt her.Â “What do I get in return?” she asks, and Doom’s piercing eyes assess her through his mask.Â “What would you like?”Â We cut back to the present, as Ms. Marvel, Wonder Man, The Wasp, The Black Widow, Ares and Spider-Woman are confronted by an army of five eyes devil-creatures, the spawn of Morgan’s magicks, obviously.Â The six Avengers are quickly overwhelmed, and awaken held in mystical stasis inside Doom’s stronghold.Â “At least we’re not NAKED,” says Spider-Woman hilariously, and Wasp seems a bit hot and bothered by the thought.Â “You saw Luke Cage naked?”Â Heh.Â
Doom refuses to speaks to them, ignoring their endless Bendis chattering, until Ms. Marvel finally screams out, “Yo, Doom!”Â Carol must be a REALLY annoying person to hang out with, when you think about it.Â “Be silent,” Doom replies, but she continues goading him until he comes over to slap her senseless.Â In a pretty funny bit, Doom thinks an ongoing trademark monologue using the new Bendis thought bubbles, explaining EVERYTHING that has happened (the attack on New York was a mistake, and he used his magic to come back from the pase est a few minutes earlier than Sentry and Iron Man) while terselyÂ saying only that nobody will care if he kills every one of the Avengers… save one.Â “The son of Zeus.Â There are those who would care.Â A battle of the gods is not one I am prepared to fight.”Â Doom intends to summon Big Daddy, and hand Ares over for a favor or two.Â Ms. Marvel taunts him again, until he screams, “You’re a fat piece of furniture I may need for trade!Â So shut your cow-mouth or I’ll remove your face by hand before I stop your whore’s heart!”Â Holy crap…Â Doom got mad.Â Carol thinks, once again hilariously, “That actually hurt my feelings…” as Doom rages and Spider-Woman suddenly starts to power up.
Despite the fact that none of them can use their powers, Spider-Woman starts generating energy, enveloping herself in a coronoa of electric energy, as her “venom-blasts” overload.Â Or do they?Â Even Doom can’t believe that Jessica Drew has this kind of power, as she blasts them loose, and the team escapes.Â Ms Marvel races into the sky, and suddenly sees Sentry and Iron Man return, as we reprise last issue’s close.Â Carol streaks up to try and warn them away, but the massive explosion badly damages Tony’s armor.Â While the Avengers fight Doombots and poop-men, Ms. Marvel and Sentry try to save Iron Man.Â “Bob…Â you got the powers of a thousand exploding suns.Â Hit me with it,” he drawls in his best John Wayne voice.Â Sentry unloads with his solar energy, as Iron Man threatens “If youÂ break this armor, it’s coming out of your paycheck.”Â
Doom tries to fight back, but suddenly an angry Sentry flies in, his face filled with distaste.Â Doom struggles, but Sentry flexes his muscles and RIPS HIS ARMOR TO PIECES with barely a twitch of his ungawdly powerful fingers.Â Doom looks at the Avengers, horrified, as Iron Man takes one last jab.Â “You recognize my authority NOW?”Â The Avengers head for home, the conquering heroes, finally having captured one of the greatest menaces to mankind, and done it without any of the really good heroes to boot.Â (Okay, that was too mean…Â I like Wasp and Wonder Man.)Â Later that day, Black Widow and Spider-Woman relax in the hot tub, as Natasha not-so-very subtlely tries to quiestion Jessica about her power display.Â Spider-Woman is uncharacteristically evasive, finally ending the questions with “We won.Â Enjoy the moment,” and making everyone sure that she’s a Skrull…Â Finally, we get a touching little page where Morgan Le Fay lies alone in her dark castle, eyes brimming with tears, as her beloved fails to materialize.Â “Victor?” she asks sadly, and I’m impressed with how well the sequence (drawn by Thor artist Marko Djurdejevic) works for me.
This is about my favorite issue of Mighty Avengers ever, finally managing to strike that difficult balance between talky and actiony, giving us some nice character moments with Ares, Black Widow, Wasp, Ms. Marvel, and even Wonder Man has a moment where you like him immensely.Â The story draws you in, and keeps you there, and even knowing what’s about to happen doesn’t dampen the tension at all.Â I have to say, Bendis really got this one right for me, and Mark Bagley’s art feels much more substantial than the last two issues.Â I wonder if, perhaps Bags (known for his great drawing speed) wasn’t working flat-out on the last couple of issues, and only got the lead time to really stick the landing on this issue?Â Either way, it’s a nice capstone to the storyline, and gives us a really scary Holy Crap moment with Sentry, showing how ridiculously powerful he is and why they’ve had to literally cripple his personality to keep him from running the entire Marvel Universe just because he wants a slushie.Â This month’s Avengers issues remind me of why Bendis was given control of the franchise: when he gets it right,Â there aren’t many who do it better.Â Mighty Avengers #11 earns a very respectable 4 out of 5 stars, and an almost iron-clad guarantee that Spider-Woman is NOT a Skrull.Â (But I think Doctor Doom IS…)